I had a disturbing dream in the middle of the night last night. There was a large egg, supposedly a duck egg (though it was at least twice the size of a normal duck egg) and I cracked it intentionally, rendering it unfit to provide the safe haven for an unborn bird. And then looked inside and saw a pathetic dying skinny fowl that had no chance to survive obviously. And the worst part was that it was making a sound, a feeble dying cry... and I was responsible for having killed it. I woke up feeling guilty and disturbed and wondered if it had something to do with my friend's plight and my participation in her demise. M is in a bad state, perhaps hanging on by a thread, and she feels that by me talking about her to others, I've made it worse for her, put her job in jeopardy. I disagree with that assessment, she did that by herself, but if it's her perception, there is weight in that too, so I feel badly that she sees me as someone she can't trust. It's hard to watch someone that you care about flounder badly, and I'm afraid that's what's happening. I aim to be very cautious and considerate from here on out. She's a great person with a grave problem. 'Alcohol is a mean master' is how this guy Tony (former bad alcoholic ) put it. My heart is aching for her.
And now that the song is written and online, I can go ahead and leave it behind and figure out what the next one is, and I believe I've got an idea worth pursuing. It came to me last night in the room as I was thinking about what to sing for 'Ladies Night' in the bar tonight. At a certain point, I want to be able to do my thing, which is make it up on the spot, go live, as it were. So I have this idea to start a l Vl ll V progression a la Heart and Soul in the key of C and then start improvising using the few Thai expressions I know and translating them into English. Once it gets rolling then chances are, the audience gets involved and it becomes that experience which is unpredictable, funny and an invitation for others to chime in. It's an opening, and then it's up to me to shape it, pick out a motif or two to repeat, so as to give it structure, laugh along, elicit participation, have fun. There's something about the Heart and Soul progression that is so familiar to me, ground zero of music, that let's me be able to just make up stuff, words, a speech, a joke etc, while the music plays and people come on along for the ride. I've had a bunch of examples over the course of my life when this was so.
Once I had a gig at the Eugene Celebration Kids Area, and I freakin' forgot my guitar. My friend Rosie dashed off for it while I was up on stage with a piano, thank God. So I started making up a song, 'I forgot my guitar, It can't have gone too far, Rosie went to get it, How could I forget it....' and I did it for like ten minutes, to the amusement of the crowd and myself. It's that progression that is so drilled into my heart from hearing it every time I went to a place with kids and a piano, it's the seed of my musical tree. And not coincidentally, it is the basis for Doo Wop, and if you spice it up a bit, it's the basis for the Tin Pan Alley stuff that I love so well. Just slap a bridge on it and you've got a thousand songs. So I'm gonna use the song 'Let's fall in love' which is a pretty good one for ladies night in Thailand, and then go off from there with expressions like 'I love you' and 'Do you have a wife?' No wife. Mi mia mai, mai mi. (believe it or not, that's how it's said in Thai....) I'll need to prepare some this afternoon in order to pull it off, but that's my plan for the participation part of the evening. And if it doesn't work so well this week, it'll be better next week. Like I mentioned, Jeff wants to build the Tuesday 9pm slot around me; he sees something that will work, and I'm appreciative of the opportunity.
The title of this post is 'Dreams' and it occurs to me that the song 'Dream' also is based on l Vl ll V, so I'll fit that one in also. It's a favorite song at the CU and I believe that it's because I introduced it last year and Dau would always come up and join me on it, to the delight of the customers. Now all the musicians tend to play it and invite Dau to join in, as it's 'her tune'. Nice. Also in the set will be Stand By Me (don't really like that song but I hear from Jeff that the ladies dig it and I can do it pretty well) (based on l Vl ll V, go figure). Hello Goodbye, Wonderful Tonight, All My Lovin (based on l Vl ll V... are you getting the picture about this progression?), and some originals for sure. I'm not quite ready at the moment, but I will be come 9pm. Jeff's thing is that 'it's not really a performance, more background music', but I'm not quite convinced of that, not the way I perceive things anyhow. He talks about liking to see his customers tapping their feet or moving their fingers as the litmus test for whether an act is working, rather than people paying rapt attention to the performer. I agree, but at a certain point, it's good to have the focus, so I'll mess around and see what works and what feels right. (And maybe I'll make about $6 woohoo!)
Today is day three of the 5 day language course, and though I've spent a little time in trying to incorporate some of what I've learned, I haven't done as much as I'd imagined. I'm just not inclined to sit and 'study', but I'm learning stuff, and I have a feeling that in preparing for this song tonight, I'll learn and assimilate more than in any other way. Give something a melody, repeat it a bunch and voila, I've got it. (That's my excuse anyhow, and I'm sticking with it:-)
Yesterday on Facebook, I posted this little anecdote from the Internet place where I hang. :This seven year old kid at the internet cafe was helping me out, looking for the owner when I had a problem etc. Then he's watching me type and he makes the hand signals that he wants to go online too. I give him 10 baht for an hour's usage. He makes the prayer pose to thank me, then gets online next to me. Big mistake :-) He's been playing World of Warcraft and jumping up and down and yelling for the past 50 minutes. (but so freakin' cute)"
Not much more to say at the moment. Time to hit the ATM (have been living quite cheaply here), take a swim, and walk across the old city 2 1/2 miles to my 1pm language class. I could rent a bike, but I do enjoy the walk. Then it'll be nap time and then prep time for tonight's gig. Looks like a good day, the sun is shining, weather pleasant, que mas quieres? What more do you want? I want my friend to be OK.
