I had a little visit with my James Bond guru yesterday, the purpose of which was to upload some more photos on to Facebook with his help. I'm starting to get the hang of it, though without a laptop here, I'm not independent yet. I suppose I can use one of the internet cafes, assuming the computers are of recent vintage, but I haven't taken that on yet. Besides, I dig David and he's happy to help. I buy his lunch or his smoothie when we meet as a way to show him my appreciation.
And along those lines.... yesterday he said that since it's the end of the year, he's making a list of 200 things he's grateful for, it's part of his process to keep things balanced and positive. He recommended that I do the same, at least 100 things. He said that doing so will make it possible to look back on the year as a great and positive experience, and then the next year will be even better. I get the feeling that it's part of his method for personal growth, and yeah, I trust this guy as a very bright light, so here at the internet cafe in Chiang Mai, December 31, 11:30am, I'll make a list.
Grateful for in 2012
My family is alive and healthy
I'm alive and healthy
My parents are still alive and coherent, what a gift!
My son is an honest person
I have a safe place to live
Food and the people who provide it
I am very loved in my community (not by everyone, God knows, but a lot of people care for me)
Words and the ability to manipulate them
OK, the Times Crossword, one of my favorite pastimes.
10 I have a great set of friends, many of them quite longstanding.
The great set of genes passed down to my from history
Laughter and a sense of humor
Dance class
Dancing with my friends for years and years
The women I get to dance with every week
The Quackers Blues Jam where I get to dance and play bass with my friends every Wednesday
CU Corner, my musical home away from home where I get to play and be part of the music scene
My Thai friends in Chiang Mai
Library gigs and the chance to 'make a party' on so many occassions
20 Tin Pan Alley songs
Senior gigs where I get to play Tin Pan Alley songs
Singing harmony
Getting to make a living doing what I love
This body that is coordinated, moves well and doesn't hurt
Doctor Jeff G, who hooks me up with a year's worth of samples that keep me breathing well
This brain that processes information so well
Listening and Compassion for others
Riding my bicycle along the Willamette River
Hong Kong Restaurant and the Tang family in Eugene (30 years of friendship)
30 Sex, or as my dad says, 'If God made anything better, he kept it for himself'
Thai massage in Thailand $7/hr
The Eugene Public Library and my place in it.
Saturday Market, the best thing in Eugene
My buddy Mark, patron of the arts (apparently) who has provided me a cheap and great place to live.
Every gig I did this year
Love in all of its forms (hmmm that one's pretty far down the list...I guess I'm pretty shallow)
The Jiffy Market, my coffee, crossword and bantering hangout in Eugene
Eugene, Or, where there are more open minded people per capita than is the norm in America
Meeting new people and making new friends
40 The internet as representative of the amazing times in which we live
Barack Hussein Obama, superstar
My ears which are my most valuable sensory tool
Those piano lessons I took with Wilma 48 years ago. Still grateful for that musical foundation
Teaching music to folks that are interested.
Reading books
Playing the guitar
Writing songs
Playing swing on piano
My voice that can still sing
50 My hands that know what to do
Gonna pause here and then return to the list before the clock strikes 12
Rolling on a new song (finally)
After a few failed forays into trying to write something new, I finally got over the hump and got one in the pipeline. It's a combination of getting that initial impulse that 'there's a song in there' followed by some focused time fleshing it out. It started a couple of nights ago when my friend Jimmy had had too much to drink (and smoke) and was waiting around trying to get sober enough to get on his scooter and ride the fifteen minutes home. I asked him if it was the weed or the whiskey that was the problem. He said a little bit of both. But when I asked the question and heard myself say 'the weed and the whiskey', I got that little ringing bell that says, 'that's a nice little sound.... could be the opening line of a country song chorus'. So I spent a couple of hours wrestling out a chorus and it looks like this:
It's the weed and the whiskey
That sets my head to spinning round
My mind is up in heaven
But my body's on the ground
I wonder if she's gone to stay
Wonder does she even miss me
Why did I throw it all away
For the weed and the whiskey
I'll get back on it today and start writing some verses. I seem to work best up in my room with a guitar and a notebook and a pen.
Spent a couple hours yesterday walking around taking pictures of some of the amazing temples that are here in Chiang Mai. I don't know how to be a 'photographer', not sure what makes a great shot, but between my own instincts, and then experiencing the process of dealing with them afterward, cropping, manipulating, uploading, I think I'll learn as I go. My first album was pretty good for the initial foray.
Kinda fun to have a camera. Last night I was in the Reggae Bar and there was this Thai Ska Band playing some pretty peppy stuff, had the crowd going. I took a couple of pictures and even rolled a minute of video. Different world when one tries to document.
I led a set at CU Corner last night from 9-10:15 pm. I was playing with a Dutch bass player I had never met and a good ole boy guitarist from Georgia, who plays OK but doesn't know the names of chords... oy. So I called a super 'least common denominator' set of tunes a la Evil Ways, Sloop John B, Blue Suede Shoes, Peaceful Easy Feeling, slipped in a couple of my simpler ones, and it worked out really well. I think I'm a pro at this kind of stuff by now. Taew paid me a little cash, and it was a positive experience. I do like leading a band....
The Kow Soi has just arrived, (chicken curry over noodles, northern Thai style), time for breakfast...
It's the weed and the whiskey
That sets my head to spinning round
My mind is up in heaven
But my body's on the ground
I wonder if she's gone to stay
Wonder does she even miss me
Why did I throw it all away
For the weed and the whiskey
I'll get back on it today and start writing some verses. I seem to work best up in my room with a guitar and a notebook and a pen.
Spent a couple hours yesterday walking around taking pictures of some of the amazing temples that are here in Chiang Mai. I don't know how to be a 'photographer', not sure what makes a great shot, but between my own instincts, and then experiencing the process of dealing with them afterward, cropping, manipulating, uploading, I think I'll learn as I go. My first album was pretty good for the initial foray.
Kinda fun to have a camera. Last night I was in the Reggae Bar and there was this Thai Ska Band playing some pretty peppy stuff, had the crowd going. I took a couple of pictures and even rolled a minute of video. Different world when one tries to document.
I led a set at CU Corner last night from 9-10:15 pm. I was playing with a Dutch bass player I had never met and a good ole boy guitarist from Georgia, who plays OK but doesn't know the names of chords... oy. So I called a super 'least common denominator' set of tunes a la Evil Ways, Sloop John B, Blue Suede Shoes, Peaceful Easy Feeling, slipped in a couple of my simpler ones, and it worked out really well. I think I'm a pro at this kind of stuff by now. Taew paid me a little cash, and it was a positive experience. I do like leading a band....
The Kow Soi has just arrived, (chicken curry over noodles, northern Thai style), time for breakfast...
Thinking about Cambodia....
Is it really OK for me to be hanging out, drinking cappuccino in the morning, swimming, eating good food, taking walks, snapping pictures, making music with friends etc while the Thais are busting their butts for $7 a day? Uh, yeah, I guess it is. OK never mind.
I'm enjoying being in Chiang Mai, the weather is perfect, though the air is polluted from lots of traffic. There is a 'haze' that seems ever-present. It gets much worse in a couple of months when they burn the rice paddies all over SE Asia, so for now, this is pretty darn great. Down south it's much hotter, sweatier at all times, and I much prefer the northern climate, and the mellow vibe of Chiang Mai.
But, I'm not gonna hang around this year. Maybe another week or so, then start making tracks to Cambodia. I have a camera, which makes things different, gives a different slant to seeing new things. And when I go to Angkor Wat, which is one of the wonders of the world, it will be nice to do some shooting and sharing. I want to experience Phnom Penh, hopefully get a visit with Kanika who is a disabled activist and professor who teaches at the University in Phnom Penh. Mark and I hosted her in Eugene about 5 years ago, and she is inspirational.
Kanika is smart, slender, very nice, and has a severe physical disability. Her legs kind of go in all different directions and she uses a wheelchair. The thing I remember most about her is a story she told me about going to the university in Cambodia. There was a class on the third floor of the building, no elevator, and she asked if it would be possible to move the class to a room on the first floor. She was told, 'no', so in order to make it to the class, she had to drag herself along the floor, up three flights of stairs to arrive late to class. Day after day. Talk about determination, she's got more in her pinky than most people have in their lifetime.
She was one of the delegates to Mobility International's WILD converntion...(Women in Leadership with Disabilities) and after that she ended up in grad school at the University of Washington in Seattle. She returned to Phnom Penh and is now a professor at the school that made her drag herself up the stairs. And I'm guessing her classes are on the first floor. We've been in touch through email, and she says that if I get to Phnom Penh, she'd love to visit with me. January is a busy time for her, but there will be time for a cup of tea and a visit. Totally looking forward to that.
In the meantime, I'll celebrate the new year here in Chiang Mai, go to the big outdoor festival at Thae Pae Gate, where they send thousands of lanterns aloft, it's an incredible sight. Tonight I have a set to play at CU Corner where I'll make a little money and lead the jam. I think I'll get a little visit with Oh on her day off tomorrow... we haven't really had a moment to check in and have a conversation, but the vibe is good and friendly, just like I was hoping for. I wish her nothing but the best.
Off to take some photos of some of the beautiful temples which are here. Grab a bowl of soup for a buck, keep my eyes open to what I'm seeing. I'm lucky to be here.
I'm enjoying being in Chiang Mai, the weather is perfect, though the air is polluted from lots of traffic. There is a 'haze' that seems ever-present. It gets much worse in a couple of months when they burn the rice paddies all over SE Asia, so for now, this is pretty darn great. Down south it's much hotter, sweatier at all times, and I much prefer the northern climate, and the mellow vibe of Chiang Mai.
But, I'm not gonna hang around this year. Maybe another week or so, then start making tracks to Cambodia. I have a camera, which makes things different, gives a different slant to seeing new things. And when I go to Angkor Wat, which is one of the wonders of the world, it will be nice to do some shooting and sharing. I want to experience Phnom Penh, hopefully get a visit with Kanika who is a disabled activist and professor who teaches at the University in Phnom Penh. Mark and I hosted her in Eugene about 5 years ago, and she is inspirational.
Kanika is smart, slender, very nice, and has a severe physical disability. Her legs kind of go in all different directions and she uses a wheelchair. The thing I remember most about her is a story she told me about going to the university in Cambodia. There was a class on the third floor of the building, no elevator, and she asked if it would be possible to move the class to a room on the first floor. She was told, 'no', so in order to make it to the class, she had to drag herself along the floor, up three flights of stairs to arrive late to class. Day after day. Talk about determination, she's got more in her pinky than most people have in their lifetime.
She was one of the delegates to Mobility International's WILD converntion...(Women in Leadership with Disabilities) and after that she ended up in grad school at the University of Washington in Seattle. She returned to Phnom Penh and is now a professor at the school that made her drag herself up the stairs. And I'm guessing her classes are on the first floor. We've been in touch through email, and she says that if I get to Phnom Penh, she'd love to visit with me. January is a busy time for her, but there will be time for a cup of tea and a visit. Totally looking forward to that.
In the meantime, I'll celebrate the new year here in Chiang Mai, go to the big outdoor festival at Thae Pae Gate, where they send thousands of lanterns aloft, it's an incredible sight. Tonight I have a set to play at CU Corner where I'll make a little money and lead the jam. I think I'll get a little visit with Oh on her day off tomorrow... we haven't really had a moment to check in and have a conversation, but the vibe is good and friendly, just like I was hoping for. I wish her nothing but the best.
Off to take some photos of some of the beautiful temples which are here. Grab a bowl of soup for a buck, keep my eyes open to what I'm seeing. I'm lucky to be here.
Square Peg
Another great night making music at CU Corner.... stop me if you've heard this one before. It was Thursday Jam Night and Taow (the woman who owns the bar) asked me if I would come and play some. Yes, of course. They seem to be able to offer live music again, after a long period of problems with the neighbors and the cops and who knows what else. I led a set that included these tunes: 'Why Don't You Love Me Like You Used to Do', Hey Good Lookin' (both by Hank Williams), Bhang Lassi and Same Same by me. Honky Tonk Woman (Stones) Proud Mary (Credence) and a couple more that escape me now. Later in the evening I led some more, and in both cases, I managed to get the crowd involved, singing and playing percussion, having fun. Afterward, Taow pulled me aside and asked if I would do some paid gigs there. She likes what I bring. And now that Jeff is temporarily out of the picture due to a hellacious motorcycle wreck in October, it's Taow's call, and yes of course, I'll help her out and do what I do.
A big part of the charm of that place is the cast of characters, both regulars and new faces. There was this big round faced 60 year old Aussie guy who sang and played easy listening music, which was perfect for the vibe at the time. His name is Craig (sound like Croyg when he says it) and we got to talking afterwards. Told me he was taught by Maoris from New Zealand which accounts for his 'polynesian style' and then shared about how his 51 year old wife died of liver cancer 14 months ago and he's been struggling to hang on ever since. A very sad story, they were on vacation in Thailand and she came back from swimming and then threw up and collapsed on the beach. Went to hospital in Bangkok and they thought it was some tropical disease, back to Australia and they thought the same. then found a mass in her liver and that was all she wrote. Pretty emotional conversation, musician to musician and I really felt for him. He's got 5 sons, and I mentioned that I'm one of \5 sons. When I described my place in \the family constellation..'The other 4 are all mortgage paying, solid citizens and then there's me'. He said 'You're the square peg' Yup.
The big news of the week (I think) is that I got over the hump and bought a camera. I had been holding out, but was getting sick of my stance. 'I don't need a camera... I use words, people have been traveling forever without a camera blah blah blah'. I'm sure it's a question of techno-phobia and unwillingness to tackle challenges.. Enter David Woodier, 38 years old, mixed race dude (Chinese/European) who grew up in Hong Kong. He's a very interesting cat, has an upper class British accent, and the stuff he talks about is high-level and thought provoking. Likes gadgets, is very good with technology and in fact makes his living in Australia by teaching technology in the mining industry. I met him my first night in town at a Christmas Eve party and I ended up inviting over to CU to meet some of the Rogue's Gallery. They took to him as well.
Turns out he is very well versed in the human potential movement a la Tony Robbins, and when I mentioned that he seemed like a cross between James Bond and Tony Robbins, he loved the image. And it so happens that he worked for a group that booked Tony Robbins events around Europe and attended them all. So he's part of that 'can do' mentality. We ended up meeting for lunch the next day and then went to the big technology store to look at cameras. First we sat down and had a chat to try and determine what it was that I needed and that done, we went and bought a cool Olympus camera for about $140, and now I'm learning how to use it. I needed a combination tech wizard and psychologist to help me get over my reticence, and yup, he's the guy. Pretty soon my blog will be full of pictures (I hope) and I'll be posting stuff on facebook as well. I know it's not a big deal to all of you who do this stuff as a matter of course, but to me, the act of breaking through a block is a big deal. Who knows what other big deals lie ahead? We shall see.
A big part of the charm of that place is the cast of characters, both regulars and new faces. There was this big round faced 60 year old Aussie guy who sang and played easy listening music, which was perfect for the vibe at the time. His name is Craig (sound like Croyg when he says it) and we got to talking afterwards. Told me he was taught by Maoris from New Zealand which accounts for his 'polynesian style' and then shared about how his 51 year old wife died of liver cancer 14 months ago and he's been struggling to hang on ever since. A very sad story, they were on vacation in Thailand and she came back from swimming and then threw up and collapsed on the beach. Went to hospital in Bangkok and they thought it was some tropical disease, back to Australia and they thought the same. then found a mass in her liver and that was all she wrote. Pretty emotional conversation, musician to musician and I really felt for him. He's got 5 sons, and I mentioned that I'm one of \5 sons. When I described my place in \the family constellation..'The other 4 are all mortgage paying, solid citizens and then there's me'. He said 'You're the square peg' Yup.
The big news of the week (I think) is that I got over the hump and bought a camera. I had been holding out, but was getting sick of my stance. 'I don't need a camera... I use words, people have been traveling forever without a camera blah blah blah'. I'm sure it's a question of techno-phobia and unwillingness to tackle challenges.. Enter David Woodier, 38 years old, mixed race dude (Chinese/European) who grew up in Hong Kong. He's a very interesting cat, has an upper class British accent, and the stuff he talks about is high-level and thought provoking. Likes gadgets, is very good with technology and in fact makes his living in Australia by teaching technology in the mining industry. I met him my first night in town at a Christmas Eve party and I ended up inviting over to CU to meet some of the Rogue's Gallery. They took to him as well.
Turns out he is very well versed in the human potential movement a la Tony Robbins, and when I mentioned that he seemed like a cross between James Bond and Tony Robbins, he loved the image. And it so happens that he worked for a group that booked Tony Robbins events around Europe and attended them all. So he's part of that 'can do' mentality. We ended up meeting for lunch the next day and then went to the big technology store to look at cameras. First we sat down and had a chat to try and determine what it was that I needed and that done, we went and bought a cool Olympus camera for about $140, and now I'm learning how to use it. I needed a combination tech wizard and psychologist to help me get over my reticence, and yup, he's the guy. Pretty soon my blog will be full of pictures (I hope) and I'll be posting stuff on facebook as well. I know it's not a big deal to all of you who do this stuff as a matter of course, but to me, the act of breaking through a block is a big deal. Who knows what other big deals lie ahead? We shall see.
Epic night of music and friendship
Well, talk about getting your chakras rearranged, I made my return to Chiang Mai yesterday and had a multi-layered, ridiculously fun Christmas Eve with my friends here. I had been in a less-than-stellar head space since arriving in Thailand nearly two weeks ago, feeling fairly disconnected, distracted, and basically not happy. Part of the frustration was being in a purely touristic zone where I was just one of the masses of Westerners needing food, a place to stay and whatever else. So the interactions are more or less going through the motions. Show your passport, get your key, order your coffee, speak English and deal with the tourist infrastructure... and with the tourists. And like I've mentioned, if you are judging 'tourism' negatively, it's ultimately a self-judgment. Yep, that about sums it up. 'I am what I despise'
Of course, if I could speak Thai, like I speak Spanish, none of that would be a problem. I'd just be talking to the tuk tuk drivers and the waiters and the old ladies and shooting the breeze, separating myself from the horde. But no, that wasn't an option. I was the horde.
So why is it different here? I still can't speak a lick, I'm still living in English and dealing with westerners, but up here, the westerners are locals, part of the fabric, and I'm one of them, even if only for the season. And it's a mixed crew with Thai wives and girlfriends, work friends, acquaintances etc. It's real life, even if it seems like a fantasy. And yeah, that's exactly what it was last night, complete with music and creativity, thought-provoking conversations (more on that later) and warm friendship with folks who genuinely care for me and are happy to have me in their world. I'm part of something here, something quite special and unique.
I was looking around the bar last night and I knew almost everybody. Somebody said, 'It's quite the Rogue's Gallery tonight', and that was pretty much on target. Lots of laughter, shared history, knowledge of each other's story... J who is a 'grower' from California, great guy, never 'worked' a day in his life, , H who runs a Celtic museum in Ireland, K the funny 'east ender' from London with a great and cockeyed sense of humor, P who someone described as the 'Svengali of the lady boys', a former naval intelligence officer now living out his pension with a different lifestyle choice, M, British, former smuggler, did some jail time in Bangkok back in the 70s and has some stories. And that's only a small sample. We know each other's exploits, we laugh together, sing harmony together, goof on each other... the fellas.
Had an excellent interaction with Oh, who is now just getting into a new relationship. The new guy was there last night, hanging out, definitely checking me out, especially if I had a word with Oh. When I broke up with her a few months ago, (because I had started a new relationship in Eugene), she said, 'It's OK, things change', and she added 'Don't be mad if I have a new boyfriend'. I assured her that I wouldn't. And last night, there was a moment when she was approachable and I said, 'Oh, I'm not mad at all that you have a boyfriend, I'm happy for you'. And she said she was happy for me too, and we both meant it.
It was so interesting to see the guy be in the position I was in the last couple of years, hanging out, waiting hours for your girlfriend to be done with work so you could take her home. Hours and hours. And more hours. I definitely don't miss being in that situation. Makes for a lot of late nights and a nutty schedule. Good luck, pal. I wish you the best. Seriously.
Meanwhile, my Hank Williams fascination of the past year bore some seriously great fruit, as we sang a bunch of his tunes last night. We were a bunch of alley cats, singing harmony, totally rocking it out, with the added twist that the lyrics are all about love gone wrong and loneliness and 'why don't you love me like you used to do' so it was perfect. Kind of like the blues can make you feel better, this was the country version, and it was a celebration of all of it, the good times and bad. The real stuff.... to a swinging country-blues beat. Perfection!
And I met and made a VERY interesting connection with a 38 year old brilliant Brit who is now working in Australia. He's kind of like 'James Bond meets Tony Robbins' and I have a sure sense that I'm going to learn a lot from him. And when I mentioned the 'Tony Robbins' piece, David said that he used to set up Tony Robbins workshops all over Europe and has attended many of them. And my sense was that he is manifesting that work in a big way, and that he is exactly who I need to learn from at this moment... aside from being a new friend. Lunch today... and the story continues. Some Christmas, let me tell you. My soul got activated in a big way last night. It's good to be home. Off to cappuccino at Noi's coffee shop, just another of the pleasures of life in Chiang Mai. Merry Christmas!
Of course, if I could speak Thai, like I speak Spanish, none of that would be a problem. I'd just be talking to the tuk tuk drivers and the waiters and the old ladies and shooting the breeze, separating myself from the horde. But no, that wasn't an option. I was the horde.
So why is it different here? I still can't speak a lick, I'm still living in English and dealing with westerners, but up here, the westerners are locals, part of the fabric, and I'm one of them, even if only for the season. And it's a mixed crew with Thai wives and girlfriends, work friends, acquaintances etc. It's real life, even if it seems like a fantasy. And yeah, that's exactly what it was last night, complete with music and creativity, thought-provoking conversations (more on that later) and warm friendship with folks who genuinely care for me and are happy to have me in their world. I'm part of something here, something quite special and unique.
I was looking around the bar last night and I knew almost everybody. Somebody said, 'It's quite the Rogue's Gallery tonight', and that was pretty much on target. Lots of laughter, shared history, knowledge of each other's story... J who is a 'grower' from California, great guy, never 'worked' a day in his life, , H who runs a Celtic museum in Ireland, K the funny 'east ender' from London with a great and cockeyed sense of humor, P who someone described as the 'Svengali of the lady boys', a former naval intelligence officer now living out his pension with a different lifestyle choice, M, British, former smuggler, did some jail time in Bangkok back in the 70s and has some stories. And that's only a small sample. We know each other's exploits, we laugh together, sing harmony together, goof on each other... the fellas.
Had an excellent interaction with Oh, who is now just getting into a new relationship. The new guy was there last night, hanging out, definitely checking me out, especially if I had a word with Oh. When I broke up with her a few months ago, (because I had started a new relationship in Eugene), she said, 'It's OK, things change', and she added 'Don't be mad if I have a new boyfriend'. I assured her that I wouldn't. And last night, there was a moment when she was approachable and I said, 'Oh, I'm not mad at all that you have a boyfriend, I'm happy for you'. And she said she was happy for me too, and we both meant it.
It was so interesting to see the guy be in the position I was in the last couple of years, hanging out, waiting hours for your girlfriend to be done with work so you could take her home. Hours and hours. And more hours. I definitely don't miss being in that situation. Makes for a lot of late nights and a nutty schedule. Good luck, pal. I wish you the best. Seriously.
Meanwhile, my Hank Williams fascination of the past year bore some seriously great fruit, as we sang a bunch of his tunes last night. We were a bunch of alley cats, singing harmony, totally rocking it out, with the added twist that the lyrics are all about love gone wrong and loneliness and 'why don't you love me like you used to do' so it was perfect. Kind of like the blues can make you feel better, this was the country version, and it was a celebration of all of it, the good times and bad. The real stuff.... to a swinging country-blues beat. Perfection!
And I met and made a VERY interesting connection with a 38 year old brilliant Brit who is now working in Australia. He's kind of like 'James Bond meets Tony Robbins' and I have a sure sense that I'm going to learn a lot from him. And when I mentioned the 'Tony Robbins' piece, David said that he used to set up Tony Robbins workshops all over Europe and has attended many of them. And my sense was that he is manifesting that work in a big way, and that he is exactly who I need to learn from at this moment... aside from being a new friend. Lunch today... and the story continues. Some Christmas, let me tell you. My soul got activated in a big way last night. It's good to be home. Off to cappuccino at Noi's coffee shop, just another of the pleasures of life in Chiang Mai. Merry Christmas!
Back in Bangkok, heading northward...
I struggled a fair amount on the southern swing of this trip. It was mostly internal, though a sore back didn't help things all that much. And the source of the struggle is more or less an existential issue, as in 'What the fuck am I doing here, anyway"? I don't really have a good answer for that at the moment, but on some level, the questioning and the discomfort often can lead to something, I don't know, educational, refreshing, deep. But uh, not yet.
I have definitely been here before, out on the road, wondering what the hell, and I guess that's part of my make up, finding that lonely place and making it through to something else. Joseph Campbell talked about the Hero's Journey, well at the moment, I'm on the Zero's Journey. And it's OK
I was scuffling around on Koh Tao, which is the scuba diving destination for Thailand. Many many competing outfits have driven the price down to where it's a great location to take the 4 day open water certification course. It costs a little under $300 and when you arrive on the island, the touts are literally shouting at you to check out their place, free accommodation for the 4 days, here here, taxi taxi, scuba scuba. I thought about it once or twice and realized that I'm just not interested in that particular pursuit. I experienced it in the Bahamas a couple of times and I hated what it did to my ears.
So I did some walking and swimming on the island, didn't really connect much except with a young guy I met who was learning bass guitar and I showed him some stuff and we jammed a couple of times. But my mood was mostly less-than-stellar, disconnected and sad. My last evening there, we stopped playing at 7:40pm and I realized that if I wanted to reserve a ferry and bus ticket to Bangkok for the next day, I had to do it by 8. I had been talking with this travel agent person in the town, a nice Burmese woman who had been quite helpful and I wanted her to have the business, so I got it in my head to hustle over there and just do it, get off the island, start something else. Trouble was, I was about 25 minutes walk away from where she was so I started jogging with my guitar and uncomfortable sandals that were ripping up my feet a bit. I passed probably 20 places where I could have bought the ticket, but I wanted her business to get the commission.
So there's the old backpacker hotfooting it down the road, going as fast as his wheezing, sore backed, sore footed, guitar carrying body would carry him (oh yeah, it was a pretty sight), but at least it was something purposeful. I made it a couple of minutes after 8, but she said no problem, made the call, made the reservation for the following morning. (she also turned the fan on and aimed it at me, seeing my sweat soaked body) And then she tried to book me a train ticket up to Chiang Mai on the night train, which was sold out. There were seats available, but 12 hours is too long, so the best option is a sleeping berth.... sold out. It's high season, things are filling up. So I figured, I've been living on the cheap, sharing a room, let's splurge on a plane ticket, Bangkok to Chiang Mai... under $90 hell yes, let's do it.
It took awhile to print out the ticket for some reason, and she ended up staying open 30 minutes later than she should have, just to accommodate me. It was above and beyond, and I gave her a 200 Baht tip ($7) which she tried to refuse. I insisted and she accepted and said, 'This is what I earn in one day". I said, 'I know, thank you very much, I really appreciate your help'. It felt right.
Caught the boat, then a 7 hour bus ride up to Bangkok, not bad. It dropped us into the heart of Khao San Road, the backpacker, western-friendly mecca which is like a sweltering Times Square of hustlers, touts, street vendors, bars, tourists, quite the nightly carnival. It was great to know where I was, find my way back to the place I had stayed before, yes there was a single room with fan, shared bathroom, $8 and I was set. There is something satisfying about knowing where you are, kind of like that 'rat brain' which knows all the pathways. I've got that kind of brain, and it was pleasurable to find my way. thought about going out and experiencing it some, but I was tired and called it a night. Right move.
Some musical friends are getting together for a Christmas Eve party tonight, and there's gonna be a free buffet. I had told them I couldn't make it, but with the new itinerary, I'm gonna be there, surprise!. Sometimes you just need some friends and familiar faces to make it through, and this is clearly one of those times. In an hour, I'm taking a van to the airport and getting on a flight, and it feels good. Looking forward to seeing friends, drinking one of Noi's delicious cappuccinos, swimming in the pool at the Royal Guest House (assuming there is a room available) and seeing if I can find that creative muse which has so far eluded me. I've made a couple of fitful attempts at creating something musically but haven't really hit yet. Not quite enough focus, given my negative head space.
The weather will be noticeably cooler up there than the sweltering heat down here. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. And the ones after that too. I have to find a way to make it out of the tourist bubble which is so comfortable, yet ultimately unsatisfying. Yeah I can have my little vacation, write my little songs, but I have a need to crack the bubble somehow and get more real with this place. To be continued.
I have definitely been here before, out on the road, wondering what the hell, and I guess that's part of my make up, finding that lonely place and making it through to something else. Joseph Campbell talked about the Hero's Journey, well at the moment, I'm on the Zero's Journey. And it's OK
I was scuffling around on Koh Tao, which is the scuba diving destination for Thailand. Many many competing outfits have driven the price down to where it's a great location to take the 4 day open water certification course. It costs a little under $300 and when you arrive on the island, the touts are literally shouting at you to check out their place, free accommodation for the 4 days, here here, taxi taxi, scuba scuba. I thought about it once or twice and realized that I'm just not interested in that particular pursuit. I experienced it in the Bahamas a couple of times and I hated what it did to my ears.
So I did some walking and swimming on the island, didn't really connect much except with a young guy I met who was learning bass guitar and I showed him some stuff and we jammed a couple of times. But my mood was mostly less-than-stellar, disconnected and sad. My last evening there, we stopped playing at 7:40pm and I realized that if I wanted to reserve a ferry and bus ticket to Bangkok for the next day, I had to do it by 8. I had been talking with this travel agent person in the town, a nice Burmese woman who had been quite helpful and I wanted her to have the business, so I got it in my head to hustle over there and just do it, get off the island, start something else. Trouble was, I was about 25 minutes walk away from where she was so I started jogging with my guitar and uncomfortable sandals that were ripping up my feet a bit. I passed probably 20 places where I could have bought the ticket, but I wanted her business to get the commission.
So there's the old backpacker hotfooting it down the road, going as fast as his wheezing, sore backed, sore footed, guitar carrying body would carry him (oh yeah, it was a pretty sight), but at least it was something purposeful. I made it a couple of minutes after 8, but she said no problem, made the call, made the reservation for the following morning. (she also turned the fan on and aimed it at me, seeing my sweat soaked body) And then she tried to book me a train ticket up to Chiang Mai on the night train, which was sold out. There were seats available, but 12 hours is too long, so the best option is a sleeping berth.... sold out. It's high season, things are filling up. So I figured, I've been living on the cheap, sharing a room, let's splurge on a plane ticket, Bangkok to Chiang Mai... under $90 hell yes, let's do it.
It took awhile to print out the ticket for some reason, and she ended up staying open 30 minutes later than she should have, just to accommodate me. It was above and beyond, and I gave her a 200 Baht tip ($7) which she tried to refuse. I insisted and she accepted and said, 'This is what I earn in one day". I said, 'I know, thank you very much, I really appreciate your help'. It felt right.
Caught the boat, then a 7 hour bus ride up to Bangkok, not bad. It dropped us into the heart of Khao San Road, the backpacker, western-friendly mecca which is like a sweltering Times Square of hustlers, touts, street vendors, bars, tourists, quite the nightly carnival. It was great to know where I was, find my way back to the place I had stayed before, yes there was a single room with fan, shared bathroom, $8 and I was set. There is something satisfying about knowing where you are, kind of like that 'rat brain' which knows all the pathways. I've got that kind of brain, and it was pleasurable to find my way. thought about going out and experiencing it some, but I was tired and called it a night. Right move.
Some musical friends are getting together for a Christmas Eve party tonight, and there's gonna be a free buffet. I had told them I couldn't make it, but with the new itinerary, I'm gonna be there, surprise!. Sometimes you just need some friends and familiar faces to make it through, and this is clearly one of those times. In an hour, I'm taking a van to the airport and getting on a flight, and it feels good. Looking forward to seeing friends, drinking one of Noi's delicious cappuccinos, swimming in the pool at the Royal Guest House (assuming there is a room available) and seeing if I can find that creative muse which has so far eluded me. I've made a couple of fitful attempts at creating something musically but haven't really hit yet. Not quite enough focus, given my negative head space.
The weather will be noticeably cooler up there than the sweltering heat down here. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. And the ones after that too. I have to find a way to make it out of the tourist bubble which is so comfortable, yet ultimately unsatisfying. Yeah I can have my little vacation, write my little songs, but I have a need to crack the bubble somehow and get more real with this place. To be continued.
Trending positively....
Made the very smart move yesterday to take my frustrations out in physical activity, so I marched, er staggered to the highest point on the island in a sweaty, gasping slog. Haven't sweated that much since last year around this time on Koh Phangan, one island to the south of here. And I came down feeling drenched and different, clearer in my mind and more opened up generally. More of the same today, feels like the way to go. Wake up, shower, food, coffee, a little internet, then sweat. Rinse and repeat.
Looks like I'm going to drop a big $25 tomorrow for an all-day, lunch-included snorkeling trip that goes to the five best spots on the island. Hey, I'm here, I've got $25, why not? And then it will be decision time, as in do I stick around the islands for awhile or do I head north to hang with my friends in Chiang Mai. There is a music party on Christmas eve that would be fun to be part of, and my friend Harris will only be around until December 26, so if I want to hang with him, I'd have to get north. We shall see. One thing at a time.
My body is starting to lose the western layer of flab which I seem to carry around back there. Why is that, one wonders. I think it's a one word answer.... (Automobile). It's nice to be without one for an extended period of time. And truth be told, one of the real reasons that I was looking forward to being in Asia was what it does to my body. browner, trimmer and healthier. So yeah, temples? OK, Buddhas? OK, Islands and Sun? yeah, pretty great, Losing weight and loving how I feel? Now we're talking! Yup, my values are of the highest, clearly.
I'm sure I'll do a bunch of writing when I'm in a place that doesn't charge $4/hour for internet access, which is what it costs here. I have a place in Chiang Mai that I use which is 35 cents/hour. That's where the writing seems to happen.
I've been missing the ability and opportunity to contribute musically. It is a large part of my happiness, bringing joy to kids and seniors and whomever. I've been keeping it to myself here, so far, but I did have a great ninety minute session last night in the room, during which time I did some preparation for an ongoing music gig at an elementary school in Eugene. I'll be working full days, once a week beginning in April with 3rd 4th and 5th graders, and I came up with some great ideas to pursue with them. Orff arrangements for some of my tunes, and the kids will dig it. Gonna get them swinging and syncopated on a bunch of different instruments. Nice opportunity ahead.
Starting to find the muse....
Looks like I'm going to drop a big $25 tomorrow for an all-day, lunch-included snorkeling trip that goes to the five best spots on the island. Hey, I'm here, I've got $25, why not? And then it will be decision time, as in do I stick around the islands for awhile or do I head north to hang with my friends in Chiang Mai. There is a music party on Christmas eve that would be fun to be part of, and my friend Harris will only be around until December 26, so if I want to hang with him, I'd have to get north. We shall see. One thing at a time.
My body is starting to lose the western layer of flab which I seem to carry around back there. Why is that, one wonders. I think it's a one word answer.... (Automobile). It's nice to be without one for an extended period of time. And truth be told, one of the real reasons that I was looking forward to being in Asia was what it does to my body. browner, trimmer and healthier. So yeah, temples? OK, Buddhas? OK, Islands and Sun? yeah, pretty great, Losing weight and loving how I feel? Now we're talking! Yup, my values are of the highest, clearly.
I'm sure I'll do a bunch of writing when I'm in a place that doesn't charge $4/hour for internet access, which is what it costs here. I have a place in Chiang Mai that I use which is 35 cents/hour. That's where the writing seems to happen.
I've been missing the ability and opportunity to contribute musically. It is a large part of my happiness, bringing joy to kids and seniors and whomever. I've been keeping it to myself here, so far, but I did have a great ninety minute session last night in the room, during which time I did some preparation for an ongoing music gig at an elementary school in Eugene. I'll be working full days, once a week beginning in April with 3rd 4th and 5th graders, and I came up with some great ideas to pursue with them. Orff arrangements for some of my tunes, and the kids will dig it. Gonna get them swinging and syncopated on a bunch of different instruments. Nice opportunity ahead.
Starting to find the muse....
Nowhere Man
Still searching for the groove, haven't quite gotten there yet, but maybe it's getting closer. I definitely feel in between worlds, not quite here, not quite there, which I guess is nowhere. Yep, I'm a nowhere man at the moment.
So it's a bit of a challenge, wondering should I even be here at all, which of course doesn't help matters. I was in Hua Hin, 4 hours south of Bangkok, a couple of days ago, and was going to do some morning yoga on the beach. I sat down on my towel, made a wrong move in starting to stretch and pulled something out of whack. I blurted out, 'Ow' which is usually a sign that I'm in store for a few days of pain, and yep, that's what happened. Kinda moving around like an old man, not too bad, but it fits the nowhere state of my mind. Not a coincidence, in other words.
I've been rooming with a 35 year old French Canadian guy I met while taking the train into Bangkok, and we're both cheap enough to value the ability to save on room rental by sharing a space. It's OK, nothing great, and I'm ready to make some other arrangements. He's heading off to meet some friends in Phuket within a few days, and I'm in a day by day state of 'whatever'.
I do like the Thai people that I meet, at least the ones who are not purely in it for the tourist dollars. I'd rather go to an all Thai breakfast spot with no English spoken and smile my way through the meal than be in one of the joints that caters to the Farang. Just feels better that way. It's a pattern, and the little bit of Thai that I can manage is starting to come back. Ready to learn some more.
I'm on Koh Tao now, a small island in the south of Thailand and it's chock full of dive schools where people can get their certification. I'm not really interested in that, but the island is beautiful, jungles and beach and hip tourists (who don't like to make eye contact, but so it goes). I'm thinking of bringing my guitar down to a shady spot and see if I can stir up some energy, see if I can shake loose a musician or two. I'm one island away from Koh Phangan where I had a great experience last year, (Bhang Lassi), so maybe something good will happen before the apocalypse.
Internet is very expensive here, so I'll keep this post short... not that I have anything great to say anyway... being a nowhere man and all that... That's right, it ain't all magic and margaritas on the road... oh well.
So it's a bit of a challenge, wondering should I even be here at all, which of course doesn't help matters. I was in Hua Hin, 4 hours south of Bangkok, a couple of days ago, and was going to do some morning yoga on the beach. I sat down on my towel, made a wrong move in starting to stretch and pulled something out of whack. I blurted out, 'Ow' which is usually a sign that I'm in store for a few days of pain, and yep, that's what happened. Kinda moving around like an old man, not too bad, but it fits the nowhere state of my mind. Not a coincidence, in other words.
I've been rooming with a 35 year old French Canadian guy I met while taking the train into Bangkok, and we're both cheap enough to value the ability to save on room rental by sharing a space. It's OK, nothing great, and I'm ready to make some other arrangements. He's heading off to meet some friends in Phuket within a few days, and I'm in a day by day state of 'whatever'.
I do like the Thai people that I meet, at least the ones who are not purely in it for the tourist dollars. I'd rather go to an all Thai breakfast spot with no English spoken and smile my way through the meal than be in one of the joints that caters to the Farang. Just feels better that way. It's a pattern, and the little bit of Thai that I can manage is starting to come back. Ready to learn some more.
I'm on Koh Tao now, a small island in the south of Thailand and it's chock full of dive schools where people can get their certification. I'm not really interested in that, but the island is beautiful, jungles and beach and hip tourists (who don't like to make eye contact, but so it goes). I'm thinking of bringing my guitar down to a shady spot and see if I can stir up some energy, see if I can shake loose a musician or two. I'm one island away from Koh Phangan where I had a great experience last year, (Bhang Lassi), so maybe something good will happen before the apocalypse.
Internet is very expensive here, so I'll keep this post short... not that I have anything great to say anyway... being a nowhere man and all that... That's right, it ain't all magic and margaritas on the road... oh well.
Laughing at...... (myself)
Oh yes, the intrepid traveler was off on a mission.... to buy a cheap guitar in Bangkok. And who is more sophisticated than this experienced wanderer, this erudite 'earth citizen'. Uh, anyone, apparently.
First I asked at the Guest House where I've been staying. She said 'go to Department Store, have guitars'. I said, no, I want to go to a music store. She said, 'don't have'. I said, 'yes have'. We smiled and said goodbye. I talked to the tuk tuk driver who overcharged me, of course, but took me to the right place... not all that far from where I'm staying. I figured I could find my way back here on foot. Note to self... whatever the tuk tuk driver quotes you for a price... come back with an offer about 1/3 of what he said. That seems to be in the ballpark. But hey, I've been took by a tuk tuk before.
So I get to the guitar place and start trying out a bunch that were in my price range. I found one that I liked well enough, steel string, Chinese made, holds its tune, good sound for the $100 price tag. I was going to ask if there were any other shops around, but I figured, this one is pretty good, I like the kid who was helping me, let's do it. Bought the guitar, a strap, cloth case, extra strings. He knocked the price down some, threw in half a dozen picks and voila, Glauber has a guitar. Nice... Intrepid traveler scores.
But then when I left the shop, I noticed there was another guitar place right next door, and another and another and another and another. I was in the flippin 'Garment District' of guitar places. How did I not notice this? I could have spent the day trying out dozens of guitars until finally settling on the best one for me. Could have played one place off against the next. Could have been the sophisticated man about town. But no, I bought from the first guy I met. And ya know what? I'm happy about it. Humble and happy. The experience was just right and I've got something I can use. something to create with.
First I asked at the Guest House where I've been staying. She said 'go to Department Store, have guitars'. I said, no, I want to go to a music store. She said, 'don't have'. I said, 'yes have'. We smiled and said goodbye. I talked to the tuk tuk driver who overcharged me, of course, but took me to the right place... not all that far from where I'm staying. I figured I could find my way back here on foot. Note to self... whatever the tuk tuk driver quotes you for a price... come back with an offer about 1/3 of what he said. That seems to be in the ballpark. But hey, I've been took by a tuk tuk before.
So I get to the guitar place and start trying out a bunch that were in my price range. I found one that I liked well enough, steel string, Chinese made, holds its tune, good sound for the $100 price tag. I was going to ask if there were any other shops around, but I figured, this one is pretty good, I like the kid who was helping me, let's do it. Bought the guitar, a strap, cloth case, extra strings. He knocked the price down some, threw in half a dozen picks and voila, Glauber has a guitar. Nice... Intrepid traveler scores.
But then when I left the shop, I noticed there was another guitar place right next door, and another and another and another and another. I was in the flippin 'Garment District' of guitar places. How did I not notice this? I could have spent the day trying out dozens of guitars until finally settling on the best one for me. Could have played one place off against the next. Could have been the sophisticated man about town. But no, I bought from the first guy I met. And ya know what? I'm happy about it. Humble and happy. The experience was just right and I've got something I can use. something to create with.
How do you spell 'alienation'?
Well let's see, I would spell it like this... 'A couple of western tourists getting foot massages while surfing the internet on their smart phones'. Something about that scene stuck out somehow, as if they are the masters and the lowly women rubbing their feet were some kind of hands-on potted plants. Not cool.... at least to this judgmental westerner. But of course, if I am to judge 'tourism', then it's an exercise in self-loathing, because I am it. But those smart phones are getting to be too much... Everyone is surfing, photographing, talking, recording, mediating at all times. It's amazing how quickly it has become the new normal.... Kind of grosses me out, but oh well...
Yesterday I basically crashed out and tried to get acclimated to the time change. Slept most of the day, read the Haj, by Leon Uris, a very interesting take on the Arab view of the world.... It's pretty scathing in its portrayal, as would befit the author of 'Exodus' but it's a good read nonetheless. Apparently all the Jews are heroic forward-thinkers, while the Arabs are simple-minded, misogynistic power trippers who use Islam as a refuge and justification for their failed society. I take it with quite the grain of salt, but there is enough historical information in the book to keep it interesting. It's good to be reading again... I miss it.
This morning I was up at 6am to get a walk in, start figuring out the geography, which way is north, where is the river, stuff like that, and I even managed to find my way back where I started from.... Wonder of wonders. A little coffee, and I'm starting to feel like I've arrived. Today is Saturday and I'm gonna buy that guitar that I need, maybe grab a tuk tuk and tell the driver that I need a music store or two. There was a terrible little street jam last night around the corner, led by a Japanese dread who played an out of tune guitar and sang with a lisp. Other than that, it was pretty good. (he said with some sarcasm) The folks who gathered on the corner were quite the international mix... some Chinese girls, one of whom had just ridden a bicycle from China to London... took her a year. I talked with a couple of young US guys, friends from the military, who were in Bangkok to drink beers and smoke lousy weed. One of them had just completed 8 years in the Navy where he was a 'Pirate interdiction' squad member, and it was heartbreaking enough that it propelled him out of the service. He talked about boarding ships, and seeing people in desperate need, broke down, drifting at sea, no food, no water, kids on board, and they weren't allowed to help them. They could give them some rations and water, but beyond that, hey good luck.
It's hot and sticky at all hours of the day, but there was a breeze on the river, and it was nice to be moving and seeing. Got to this one place where the old ladies were doing Tai Chi, some younger people were working out to some horrid techno-zumba groove, being taught by an emaciated looking instructor. Yikes! But hey, people got to move. (I guess). Not to be judgmental, of course.
In other words, nothing much to report, just trying to get my feet on the ground. And I'm wondering if I even want to write. (of course I do). But the last couple of years I've been extremely open about what goes on in my brain, good and bad, and maybe that desire has run its course. We shall see...
Yesterday I basically crashed out and tried to get acclimated to the time change. Slept most of the day, read the Haj, by Leon Uris, a very interesting take on the Arab view of the world.... It's pretty scathing in its portrayal, as would befit the author of 'Exodus' but it's a good read nonetheless. Apparently all the Jews are heroic forward-thinkers, while the Arabs are simple-minded, misogynistic power trippers who use Islam as a refuge and justification for their failed society. I take it with quite the grain of salt, but there is enough historical information in the book to keep it interesting. It's good to be reading again... I miss it.
This morning I was up at 6am to get a walk in, start figuring out the geography, which way is north, where is the river, stuff like that, and I even managed to find my way back where I started from.... Wonder of wonders. A little coffee, and I'm starting to feel like I've arrived. Today is Saturday and I'm gonna buy that guitar that I need, maybe grab a tuk tuk and tell the driver that I need a music store or two. There was a terrible little street jam last night around the corner, led by a Japanese dread who played an out of tune guitar and sang with a lisp. Other than that, it was pretty good. (he said with some sarcasm) The folks who gathered on the corner were quite the international mix... some Chinese girls, one of whom had just ridden a bicycle from China to London... took her a year. I talked with a couple of young US guys, friends from the military, who were in Bangkok to drink beers and smoke lousy weed. One of them had just completed 8 years in the Navy where he was a 'Pirate interdiction' squad member, and it was heartbreaking enough that it propelled him out of the service. He talked about boarding ships, and seeing people in desperate need, broke down, drifting at sea, no food, no water, kids on board, and they weren't allowed to help them. They could give them some rations and water, but beyond that, hey good luck.
It's hot and sticky at all hours of the day, but there was a breeze on the river, and it was nice to be moving and seeing. Got to this one place where the old ladies were doing Tai Chi, some younger people were working out to some horrid techno-zumba groove, being taught by an emaciated looking instructor. Yikes! But hey, people got to move. (I guess). Not to be judgmental, of course.
In other words, nothing much to report, just trying to get my feet on the ground. And I'm wondering if I even want to write. (of course I do). But the last couple of years I've been extremely open about what goes on in my brain, good and bad, and maybe that desire has run its course. We shall see...
Grinding
I'm in a bit of an altered state, sitting here in the humid Bangkok open air guest house where I'm staying. Found a super cheap place to spend this first night... a $12 room that I'm sharing with a fellow traveler from Quebec, who I met at the airport. We both had the same thought after arriving last night at midnight. Why go into town and try to find a room in the middle of the night, when it's easier (and free) to just crash out a few hours until daybreak. That's what I was thinking anyhow, and I had a relatively pleasant few hours reading and snoozing, then had some energy at 5:45 am, so let's go. Turns out there is a train that runs into town fromthe airport, so I got that figured out and caught the first train of the day into town. That's where i met the guy from Quebec, so we ended up sharing a cab ride to Khao San Street, the heart of the Bangkok for Westerners scene.
Most places were full at 7am, at least until folks start checking out, but we found a spot that was clean and available, and we were both ready to call it 'good'. So here I am on day one, showered, tired, and quite content to be not walking around with a backpack. Nap time, stretch time, food time, take it easy time. Couldn't have gone much smoother, given the miles involved. zzzzzzzzz
Most places were full at 7am, at least until folks start checking out, but we found a spot that was clean and available, and we were both ready to call it 'good'. So here I am on day one, showered, tired, and quite content to be not walking around with a backpack. Nap time, stretch time, food time, take it easy time. Couldn't have gone much smoother, given the miles involved. zzzzzzzzz
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