Well it's 7:07pm and I have no gig, so I'm kind of at a loss... my life seems to be largely oriented around my performing schedule... when I get those 3 hour shots of performing, I feel alive and involved and focused. On the off days, things are a little more vague. Not that I'm complaining, I feel great, just want to be playing. Or writing, so what the heck, I'll write.
After talking to my friend John about some Cambodia particulars, I decided to check into flights, check availability and schedules, and boom, there it is, a perfect connection through Bangkok that gets me into Phnom Penh at 2:30 in the afternoon. Leave Chiang Mai at 10am, nice transfer in BKK, arrive in Cambodia at a good time. Maybe even time to catch a bus down to Sihanoukville on the same day. Sweet. All I have to do is CLICK... so I did. Decision made, no big overland journey, no new sights, just a direct shot over the border into the next chapter. Feels right. If I travel with Julie next winter, I'll be more open to discovering new places, finding new travel modes etc. But on my own, I'd rather just get there and get set up. So I will.
I got some visa photographs taken so that is covered, got my reservation for a week from Tuesday, which is the last day of my Thai 60-day visa allowance. And coincidentally I get to do my last week at the restaurant, end on Monday night and be in the air on Tuesday morning. Perfect! Couldn't be easier (he said hopefully). And what a visit it has been! Between the dentistry and the gigs, the friendships and the yoga, the Buddhist reading, the mindful walks, it's been just a perfect retreat for the likes of me. And the bonus is that I'm feeling incredibly connected to my sweetheart back in Oregon, lots of writing and skyping and wonder of wonders, it feels like we're even closer than when we left, if that's possible. There's something miraculous about that, as I had carried the notion that if I were to go off on a 100 days journey, what are the chances that I'd have a love to come back to. It didn't seem possible, but now it does, and that's a revelation. Sweet revelation... like I might actually deserve to have love? Never quite felt that way before... I do now.
I have a fairly consistent sense of well-being on this trip, and why not? The weather is great, the food is great, I'm healthy, not a toke in a month and a half, the occasional drink, consistent yoga, consistent swimming, zero television. It's like maximizing the good things and minimizing the energy suckers, so sure, why not feel great? Maybe it's close to that 'miracle' state that I 'discovered' when I was about fifteen or sixteen and had my first revelation that 'life is a miracle' and the more I remember that, the happier I will be. It was a powerful jolt of spirit back then, I knew it at the time, even wrote my future self a letter to remind me what I had discovered... and it feels like it's close to the surface again, that sense of wonder and gratitude for the gift of life. I read this article in the Buddhist book about someone asking the Buddha if we should think about 'death' every day. And the answer was that we should think about death with every breath. Not in a maudlin way of course, but with the appreciation that this life is SO PRECIOUS and the more we remember that, the more conscious we become... Hmmm maybe I was a Buddhist way back when. I certainly feel like one these days. I wear my Buddha around my neck every day. When I take it off, I put it at the head of my bed, so my feet don't point at it. It's a tradition and I respect it. Just bought another installment of the 'Best of Buddhist Writing' and I love digging into the articles. It's exactly the right time.
So now I can look forward to 8 more evenings in the restaurant, a bunch more jams at the CU Corner, a dozen or so more walks crosstown to yoga in the park, friendship, sun, reading, music. And then farewell Chiang Mai for this year. I've been learning how to be in a different way this year. Instead of going to my default pattern of 'where are the women, how can I meet one?' I've been searching for a new mode. I've got real love on the other side of the world, and it's just a much higher value than the perpetual chase for 'connection', whatever that means. It's an adjustment for sure, but it feels like a necessary and worthy pursuit, to find 'connection' inside myself, with my heart and mind. And the more I do, the more the illusions can fade into the air, circle back into the ether. Good times...
That's right, I skipped yoga... everything is different...
Well well well, I feel the changes a comin' on. Looking at the calendar, I see that my 2 month visa is up in two weeks and it's time to start formulating a plan for the second half of my trip. I broached the idea of extending the stay here in Chiang Mai to Dash and Noi last night, wondering about keeping the run going and remaining a restaurant musician. They were supportive if that's what I wanted to do, but the fact is, things slow down, it might not be as interesting for me, and February is mostly about Chinese people celebrating their New Year. They're happy to have me stay on, but then I'd feel like even more of a 'Court Musician' than I already am, so I got the sense that it's time to bust a move. Glad I broached it, now I can start to plan the next phase.
I could buy a plane ticket to Bangkok and then on to Phnom Penh, and from there catch a bus down to Sihanoukville where I have friends and musical opportunities. That's a pretty good option and probably the leader in the clubhouse at this writing. (assuming there are tickets available, which I suspect there are). Or I could give myself a chance to see something new, make my way into Laos, head overland to Cambodia.. lots of time and travel in that option, not sure if it's what I'm looking for, but it's a possibility. I really enjoyed the boat trip to Luang Prabang I took 3 years ago, and that city is awesome. But I've already seen it, so there is some desire to take a new route. And Vietnam is also a possibility, either in the north or the south with friends in both Hanoi and Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon). But then again, I've been two months in the city, it sounds good to be more rural... or more on the beach. Hmmmm.
One thing in favor of a road trip is the fact that I'm traveling real light... it all fits in my mid-size backpack, and my guitar has a good case... So anything is possible. Time to imagine what I want to experience in late January and early February. I'll start asking around and doing whatever meager research I might initiate... it's not exactly my style... But tis time...
In the meantime I've got gigs to play, money to make, laps to swim and asanas to practice. And Dash turned me onto a GREAT song in Spanish that I'm learning. La Camisa Negra. super groove, just my style, even if the subject matter isn't. It's called the black shirt, about a guy who wears a black shirt to match his black soul that he's had since his lady fell out of love with him... But since it's in Spanish and folks won't understand the lyric, it's all good. (my lady loves me anyhow:-) right? thought so...
I could buy a plane ticket to Bangkok and then on to Phnom Penh, and from there catch a bus down to Sihanoukville where I have friends and musical opportunities. That's a pretty good option and probably the leader in the clubhouse at this writing. (assuming there are tickets available, which I suspect there are). Or I could give myself a chance to see something new, make my way into Laos, head overland to Cambodia.. lots of time and travel in that option, not sure if it's what I'm looking for, but it's a possibility. I really enjoyed the boat trip to Luang Prabang I took 3 years ago, and that city is awesome. But I've already seen it, so there is some desire to take a new route. And Vietnam is also a possibility, either in the north or the south with friends in both Hanoi and Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon). But then again, I've been two months in the city, it sounds good to be more rural... or more on the beach. Hmmmm.
One thing in favor of a road trip is the fact that I'm traveling real light... it all fits in my mid-size backpack, and my guitar has a good case... So anything is possible. Time to imagine what I want to experience in late January and early February. I'll start asking around and doing whatever meager research I might initiate... it's not exactly my style... But tis time...
In the meantime I've got gigs to play, money to make, laps to swim and asanas to practice. And Dash turned me onto a GREAT song in Spanish that I'm learning. La Camisa Negra. super groove, just my style, even if the subject matter isn't. It's called the black shirt, about a guy who wears a black shirt to match his black soul that he's had since his lady fell out of love with him... But since it's in Spanish and folks won't understand the lyric, it's all good. (my lady loves me anyhow:-) right? thought so...
Forty days and forty nights
Well out of a hundred days in Asia, I'm cruising into the forties, and it's been remarkable for how predictable, unexciting, repetitious and absolutely wonderful it has been. I suppose each trip is a discovery about where I'm at at a particular time in my life, sometimes it's about putting on the miles, seeing lots of different things, and sometimes it is the opposite. This time it's about routine, breathing, yoga, music, friends and a looking inward. I'm a 'terrible tourist', don't do the tourist things, don't care about the elephants or the hilltribe folks or the tigers. I don't want to go trekking with a bunch of Europeans, don't want to go 'white water rafting' (allegedly) or do the zipline through the jungle canopy. I did a little of that my first year here, it was ok, not interested anymore. Don't want to rent a motorbike, maybe a bicycle once in a while. Don't want to get on the minivan up to Pai, or go down to the islands and sit on the beach. Don't want to smoke and drink and chase women (or ladyboys). I'm a terrible tourist.
Instead I'm just super content to go for the morning coffee, read an article or two in 'The Best of Buddhist Writing 2011', walk through the old city to the park, rent a straw mat, do a yoga practice for an hour or more, have some water, maybe grab a bowl of noodle soup on the way back through town, go to the internet place and do some reading and visiting with friends, head back to the guest house for an afternoon swim. Head up to the room for a nap, since I can't seem to stay asleep more than 5 hours at night. I might work on some music in the room, and then I'll head off to some kind of gig or other most nights. I'm up to 4 nights a week at the restaurant, and that gig is financing my stay here. I play about 3 hours, include a lot of originals, try to meet the needs of the diners... sometimes I'm in the background, sometimes I 'perform' more, get some interaction going, get some laughs. Every night is different, but what's the same is going there early, getting a meal, getting set up, plugging in and playing music. Routine.
My visa is up on January 28 which means I need to be leaving the country by then, or else applying for a one month extension, which is available for about $55. It's undecided at this point... My friends really want me in Cambodia, I'm kind of the meal ticket because with me there, we can earn pretty good money... (plus we're friends). But there are a few factors, one of which is the precarious state of the Thai political situation. This coming Monday there will be an enormous rally by the opposition party whose goal is to shut down Bangkok and drive the caretaker government from power. Force their hand. It's a very complicated situation and very fluid as well. The main interest seems to be what the response of the military will be. There is lots of talk about a military coup and takeover, and there is much potential for violence. So any transit through Bangkok is potentially problematic in the near future, though it's likely that the airport will be spared. It would be stupid to kill the goose that lays the golden eggs (tourism). So if I go to Cambodia, I'll likely forego the night train to Bangkok, bus to the border option, in favor of flying above it all to a landing in Phnom Penh. No decisions yet, I'm watching carefully... especially on Monday the 13th D Day.
As far as staying in Chiang Mai, there are things that favor that option. For one, I'm in a stellar healthy groove, feeling good, got my Asia body on, I've dropped the usual 10-15 pounds which I carry in Eugene, I'm making a ton of music and paying my way here, which is a thrill. And I've been connecting with some of the best musicians in town, and there is talk about maybe recording some of the Asia tunes I've written over the years. That would be fun and I'm looking into what it would take in terms of personnel and money. I got called up onstage the other night at a big jam at Yummy Pizza, and the players loved what I did, they friended me on Facebook, and we're getting together on Sunday for a different jam. Turns out the drummer, Rod, (who is excellent) has a home studio and the capability of recording well, and the bass player Randy is great, there's a good lead guitar player who I'm gonna rehearse with this afternoon, and even some fantastic horn players available. The trumpet player is local legend Roddy Lorimer, 60 from Glasgow who has played with the Stones, the Who, the Waterboys and others. He and his sax playing buddy jammed with me the other night at Yummy, wrote horn lines on the spot and it just lifted the music. It would be SO COOL to record with them. I'll know more soon...
I guess the main theme of the first 40 days is the yoga and the Buddhist reading and reflecting. I'm quite calm, even centered, happy on a daily basis, just really pleased to be in the sun and the warm, eating good food, talking to interesting people, making music with some great players and some not-so-great. So happy to have my good guitar here, with the good case, the case gets a lot of compliments and attention. It's a backpack style tan affair, real solid and comfortable to carry around. Thank you Parkwood Company (a subsidiary of Guitar Center). Between the music and the meditation, I don't seem to lack for anything, well there's one thing, but that can wait until I get back home. It's just a blessing to have this great city of Chiang Mai which feels like a second home to me. My dental work is done, I have many friends and associates, people to hang around with, a place to swim and to do yoga. And as the young French woman said in a conversation about how lucky we are to be in this part of the world during the winter, 'I choose to be lucky'. And apparently so do I. 'I choose to be lucky'.
Instead I'm just super content to go for the morning coffee, read an article or two in 'The Best of Buddhist Writing 2011', walk through the old city to the park, rent a straw mat, do a yoga practice for an hour or more, have some water, maybe grab a bowl of noodle soup on the way back through town, go to the internet place and do some reading and visiting with friends, head back to the guest house for an afternoon swim. Head up to the room for a nap, since I can't seem to stay asleep more than 5 hours at night. I might work on some music in the room, and then I'll head off to some kind of gig or other most nights. I'm up to 4 nights a week at the restaurant, and that gig is financing my stay here. I play about 3 hours, include a lot of originals, try to meet the needs of the diners... sometimes I'm in the background, sometimes I 'perform' more, get some interaction going, get some laughs. Every night is different, but what's the same is going there early, getting a meal, getting set up, plugging in and playing music. Routine.
My visa is up on January 28 which means I need to be leaving the country by then, or else applying for a one month extension, which is available for about $55. It's undecided at this point... My friends really want me in Cambodia, I'm kind of the meal ticket because with me there, we can earn pretty good money... (plus we're friends). But there are a few factors, one of which is the precarious state of the Thai political situation. This coming Monday there will be an enormous rally by the opposition party whose goal is to shut down Bangkok and drive the caretaker government from power. Force their hand. It's a very complicated situation and very fluid as well. The main interest seems to be what the response of the military will be. There is lots of talk about a military coup and takeover, and there is much potential for violence. So any transit through Bangkok is potentially problematic in the near future, though it's likely that the airport will be spared. It would be stupid to kill the goose that lays the golden eggs (tourism). So if I go to Cambodia, I'll likely forego the night train to Bangkok, bus to the border option, in favor of flying above it all to a landing in Phnom Penh. No decisions yet, I'm watching carefully... especially on Monday the 13th D Day.
As far as staying in Chiang Mai, there are things that favor that option. For one, I'm in a stellar healthy groove, feeling good, got my Asia body on, I've dropped the usual 10-15 pounds which I carry in Eugene, I'm making a ton of music and paying my way here, which is a thrill. And I've been connecting with some of the best musicians in town, and there is talk about maybe recording some of the Asia tunes I've written over the years. That would be fun and I'm looking into what it would take in terms of personnel and money. I got called up onstage the other night at a big jam at Yummy Pizza, and the players loved what I did, they friended me on Facebook, and we're getting together on Sunday for a different jam. Turns out the drummer, Rod, (who is excellent) has a home studio and the capability of recording well, and the bass player Randy is great, there's a good lead guitar player who I'm gonna rehearse with this afternoon, and even some fantastic horn players available. The trumpet player is local legend Roddy Lorimer, 60 from Glasgow who has played with the Stones, the Who, the Waterboys and others. He and his sax playing buddy jammed with me the other night at Yummy, wrote horn lines on the spot and it just lifted the music. It would be SO COOL to record with them. I'll know more soon...
I guess the main theme of the first 40 days is the yoga and the Buddhist reading and reflecting. I'm quite calm, even centered, happy on a daily basis, just really pleased to be in the sun and the warm, eating good food, talking to interesting people, making music with some great players and some not-so-great. So happy to have my good guitar here, with the good case, the case gets a lot of compliments and attention. It's a backpack style tan affair, real solid and comfortable to carry around. Thank you Parkwood Company (a subsidiary of Guitar Center). Between the music and the meditation, I don't seem to lack for anything, well there's one thing, but that can wait until I get back home. It's just a blessing to have this great city of Chiang Mai which feels like a second home to me. My dental work is done, I have many friends and associates, people to hang around with, a place to swim and to do yoga. And as the young French woman said in a conversation about how lucky we are to be in this part of the world during the winter, 'I choose to be lucky'. And apparently so do I. 'I choose to be lucky'.
Off the charts!
Still buzzing from last night's party at Yummy Pizza. It was some kind of anniversary of the business so they had a big band on hand, including some American guy on keys and squeeze, along with the best of the local players. I was purely audience last night, eating pizza, visiting with friends. But then after the set I was told they were calling me up on the stage, so what the hell, sure. Didn't have a guitar with me, had to borrow Tony's, got it plugged in, ran over a few chords with Randy Fournier (bass) and Oliver (lead) and off we went on Same Same. It went well, swung into Bhang Lassie, it went well and then onto the next. I asked the horn section if they would join me for the next song and up they came from their break to return to the mic.
I don't know the sax player's name, but the trumpet player is local legend Roddy Lorimer, 60 from Glasgow who had a long and very distinguished recording career in Europe, appearing with the Stones, The Who, the Waterboys and many more major acts. He's incredible, he and the sax can just improvise harmony lines on the fly, and WOW! what a sound!. So when we played Boom Boom, it was a total party. The accordion guy jumped up on stage as well, so it was a 7 piece rocking groove that the audience loved. And I got to band lead from the microphone, signalling breaks, calling solos, bringing down the volume as needed. Totally fun and entertaining. I was jumping up and down, pizza belly notwithstanding. Somebody called out Jambalaya and I sang lead and conducted that one as well and it was just incredibly satisfying. For me the best part is that these professional musicians loved my stuff and wanted to be there That's a great feeling. And since my ride was wanting to go back to town, I had to scoot out of there and get on the road. (Not a bad idea, actually, better leave them wanting more rather than less). The same crew gets together on Sunday at some hotel on the river and I'm gonna make it this time.
Oliver Benjamin (aka The Dude) is an excellent player and very talented writer. He developed a website called Dudeism.com which is a hysterical tribute to the Big Lebowski and it's just funny start to finish. He has asked me a few times if I've recorded these Thailand tunes and I say no, but now that I've hooked in with a bunch of great players who like them, hmmmm I could see making it happen here. I'm gonna look into that when I meet with them on Sunday. Wouldn't that be something! And if I do that, then I'd probably stick around Chiang Mai, extend the visa which I can do by a month... To be determined. But it is powerful to play with a great rhythm section, horn section etc.
The fun onstage more than made up for the bad headache I had all night. I wonder if I've officially gone into the 'gluten intolerant' phase of my life. I get headaches occasionally, but this one was bad and I ate a bunch of pizza. Got kind of gluttonous and paid the price. No more of that, surely. But my morning coffee, a great yoga workout in the park, and I feel great again. Ready for some food now, and I'll go to the place round the corner from my guest house, the one that caters to the high school students on their lunch break. I get a nice plate of rice with veggies and pork, along with a bowl of consomme for $1. Tasty, healthy and good. Can't beat it. Have I mentioned that I love Chiang Mai? And then I get to play 4 out of the next 5 nights at the restaurant, make some money, make a bunch of music... Heaven!
I don't know the sax player's name, but the trumpet player is local legend Roddy Lorimer, 60 from Glasgow who had a long and very distinguished recording career in Europe, appearing with the Stones, The Who, the Waterboys and many more major acts. He's incredible, he and the sax can just improvise harmony lines on the fly, and WOW! what a sound!. So when we played Boom Boom, it was a total party. The accordion guy jumped up on stage as well, so it was a 7 piece rocking groove that the audience loved. And I got to band lead from the microphone, signalling breaks, calling solos, bringing down the volume as needed. Totally fun and entertaining. I was jumping up and down, pizza belly notwithstanding. Somebody called out Jambalaya and I sang lead and conducted that one as well and it was just incredibly satisfying. For me the best part is that these professional musicians loved my stuff and wanted to be there That's a great feeling. And since my ride was wanting to go back to town, I had to scoot out of there and get on the road. (Not a bad idea, actually, better leave them wanting more rather than less). The same crew gets together on Sunday at some hotel on the river and I'm gonna make it this time.
Oliver Benjamin (aka The Dude) is an excellent player and very talented writer. He developed a website called Dudeism.com which is a hysterical tribute to the Big Lebowski and it's just funny start to finish. He has asked me a few times if I've recorded these Thailand tunes and I say no, but now that I've hooked in with a bunch of great players who like them, hmmmm I could see making it happen here. I'm gonna look into that when I meet with them on Sunday. Wouldn't that be something! And if I do that, then I'd probably stick around Chiang Mai, extend the visa which I can do by a month... To be determined. But it is powerful to play with a great rhythm section, horn section etc.
The fun onstage more than made up for the bad headache I had all night. I wonder if I've officially gone into the 'gluten intolerant' phase of my life. I get headaches occasionally, but this one was bad and I ate a bunch of pizza. Got kind of gluttonous and paid the price. No more of that, surely. But my morning coffee, a great yoga workout in the park, and I feel great again. Ready for some food now, and I'll go to the place round the corner from my guest house, the one that caters to the high school students on their lunch break. I get a nice plate of rice with veggies and pork, along with a bowl of consomme for $1. Tasty, healthy and good. Can't beat it. Have I mentioned that I love Chiang Mai? And then I get to play 4 out of the next 5 nights at the restaurant, make some money, make a bunch of music... Heaven!
'I choose to be lucky'
Yup another day of yoga and music and coffee and mindfulness. I think I love the familiarity of it, the predictability and the rhythm, the sweat and the callouses, the 2pm coffee with the grey haired guys, the comfort of knowing the sound system at Dash restaurant, getting efficient with the tuning up, the transition from recorded music to live music. I tend to start the same way each time, with a couple of instrumental pieces that make a seamless transition into live music. There are some tables that are close to where I play, and I want to give the diners a smooth entree into my set, don't want to come on too strong. It's a ritual, I suppose, and I'm drawn to ritual. So I start with a couple of mellow songs I wrote some years ago, each one has a time and a place (to me) and there's something satisfying about that as well. It's the fact that this music is cumulative, it keeps building over the years and now I have an opportunity to express the sounds of a lifetime in this particular moment. Hmmmm that's kind of a Buddhist thought, though I can't quite put my finger on why, just yet. But we have this moment and it's a moment in the context of the vastness of the universe, the eternal now, and I get to make a soundtrack of it 4 nights a week.
And the longer I do it, the more things are coming out, the more memories, thoughts of friends, some departed, they're all here when I play the songs associated with them. My soul brother, Howie Lawrence from the Keys taught me 'Island in the Sun' and that one came out the other night, along with his memory. Katie Hunter from Tallahassee taught me 'Paper Moon' at a singalong on her land cooperative, so I think of her departed spirit as I sing the song. I pulled out 'There's a Place for Us' the finale of West Side Story, the other night, and that song was my absolute favorite composition ten years ago. And that's the spirit of Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim, two giants. So these memories are flooding my spirit as I sing into the mic and try to touch the crowd. They're not just songs, they're little universes.
It was 9pm last night and I had finished two hours, there was some crowd but not huge, so I asked Dash if he wanted me to stop or keep going. He said it was up to me. If I keep going, that's an extra ten bucks, so sure I want to play that next hour, but I wanted to give him the option to say, 'That's good for tonight'. But he turned it back to me so I kept playing and a few parties showed up to be part of the music and it turned into a great final set. Made some tips, some folks were singing along, making requests, we had some laughs. What a great gig this is!. Made close to $50 between the pay and the tips and that's a nice 3 hours of work here, where my room costs $10 and I can get a good bowl of soup for $1.
Then I headed around the corner to play some at CU Corner, my former (and present stomping ground). Ended up on the stage there, got a great response and a lot of appreciation, invited Noel up to sing a few songs, he's an older Irish gent, very funny, fluent in Thai, loves my tunes and sense of humor, one of the good connections I've made this visit to Chiang Mai. It was his last night in town so it was fun to give him the spotlight, and he's got an amazing voice (for a heavy smoker). Just one of those gifts, I suppose. We sang, Bye Bye Love, What a Wonderful World and I Can't Help Falling in Love With You. People didn't really know what a great singer he is so there was surprise and appreciation. And then Billy (Aussie guitar player 62 years old) asked if I could play that song 'One Little Glance' from that Oregon songwriter chap (me). It was the first time anyone requested that one and I happily obliged. It's a really solid jazz tune that I'm proud of and folks dug it a lot.
And then Pavel and Daniel, the gypsy jazz guys showed up to play at 11:30, so I switched to bass and anchored their virtuosity, read through the charts, and once again it was a great and well appreciated hour of jazz and swing, Django Reinhart style. It's such a thrill to get to play with great guys and great players, to earn their respect and appreciation and to provide music for the customers. I played 5 and 1/2 hours of music last night, was fed a great meal, got my drinks paid for. What a gift it is to make music!
And the title of this piece, which seems to fit the way I'm feeling was uttered by a young French woman who I met this morning as she and her friend were waiting for the minivan to arrive and take them up to Pai, in the north. I was having coffee at Noi's (different Noi than the restaurant owner), and we had one of those, where ya going, how's your trip type conversations. We agreed that we are so fortunate to be spending the winter in SE Asia as opposed to the States or France and she said, 'I choose to be lucky'. I love the sound of that... it's got that little bit of whimsy that captures well this moment in time. I choose to be lucky too.
And the longer I do it, the more things are coming out, the more memories, thoughts of friends, some departed, they're all here when I play the songs associated with them. My soul brother, Howie Lawrence from the Keys taught me 'Island in the Sun' and that one came out the other night, along with his memory. Katie Hunter from Tallahassee taught me 'Paper Moon' at a singalong on her land cooperative, so I think of her departed spirit as I sing the song. I pulled out 'There's a Place for Us' the finale of West Side Story, the other night, and that song was my absolute favorite composition ten years ago. And that's the spirit of Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim, two giants. So these memories are flooding my spirit as I sing into the mic and try to touch the crowd. They're not just songs, they're little universes.
It was 9pm last night and I had finished two hours, there was some crowd but not huge, so I asked Dash if he wanted me to stop or keep going. He said it was up to me. If I keep going, that's an extra ten bucks, so sure I want to play that next hour, but I wanted to give him the option to say, 'That's good for tonight'. But he turned it back to me so I kept playing and a few parties showed up to be part of the music and it turned into a great final set. Made some tips, some folks were singing along, making requests, we had some laughs. What a great gig this is!. Made close to $50 between the pay and the tips and that's a nice 3 hours of work here, where my room costs $10 and I can get a good bowl of soup for $1.
Then I headed around the corner to play some at CU Corner, my former (and present stomping ground). Ended up on the stage there, got a great response and a lot of appreciation, invited Noel up to sing a few songs, he's an older Irish gent, very funny, fluent in Thai, loves my tunes and sense of humor, one of the good connections I've made this visit to Chiang Mai. It was his last night in town so it was fun to give him the spotlight, and he's got an amazing voice (for a heavy smoker). Just one of those gifts, I suppose. We sang, Bye Bye Love, What a Wonderful World and I Can't Help Falling in Love With You. People didn't really know what a great singer he is so there was surprise and appreciation. And then Billy (Aussie guitar player 62 years old) asked if I could play that song 'One Little Glance' from that Oregon songwriter chap (me). It was the first time anyone requested that one and I happily obliged. It's a really solid jazz tune that I'm proud of and folks dug it a lot.
And then Pavel and Daniel, the gypsy jazz guys showed up to play at 11:30, so I switched to bass and anchored their virtuosity, read through the charts, and once again it was a great and well appreciated hour of jazz and swing, Django Reinhart style. It's such a thrill to get to play with great guys and great players, to earn their respect and appreciation and to provide music for the customers. I played 5 and 1/2 hours of music last night, was fed a great meal, got my drinks paid for. What a gift it is to make music!
And the title of this piece, which seems to fit the way I'm feeling was uttered by a young French woman who I met this morning as she and her friend were waiting for the minivan to arrive and take them up to Pai, in the north. I was having coffee at Noi's (different Noi than the restaurant owner), and we had one of those, where ya going, how's your trip type conversations. We agreed that we are so fortunate to be spending the winter in SE Asia as opposed to the States or France and she said, 'I choose to be lucky'. I love the sound of that... it's got that little bit of whimsy that captures well this moment in time. I choose to be lucky too.
Deeper....
I seem t be getting deeper into the spirit groove of this winter retreat, and it's a beautiful thing. I used to say that Chiang Mai was an artist's retreat for me, and that may still apply, but more than the art, I'm finding that it's about the breathing, the mindfulness, the interior landscape. My book is really helping in this shift. Every day I read a few chapters from 'Best Buddhist Writing of 2011' and the cumulative effect of it is permeating my awareness. Like today I was reading the piece by Thich Nhat Hanh, who among other things is known for his meditation walking, and it got me more tuned into the walking, the breathing, the seeing, the peace. It was a lovely stroll over to the park for the daily yoga practice.
And in yesterday's yoga convergence, three of us got together and Satia, who claims to be a yoga teacher, led us. She was great and the thing that she said which I hadn't quite internalized before is that yoga is not about a workout or a competition. It's a coordination of the breathing with the movement of the body. So this pose is on an in breath and this pose is on an out breath and it brings the breath and the body together. I kinda knew that on some level, but hearing it now, it totally made sense. And of course the more I do it, the more it becomes second nature, and the deeper we go.
Which is not to say that I'm turning into some kind of guru dude, far from it, but I am acquiring some very useful tools along the path of (hopefully) wisdom. That's what it's about, right, this 'getting older' thing? It's not about consuming more or eating more dinners at fancy restaurants, it's about becoming more wise, and more compassionate, both inside and out. It's not about controlling the thoughts, or squelching the impulses. Those are going to come, we couldn't stop them if we wanted to. It's about accepting them, making peace with them, allowing for them, letting them pass.
I never thought that I could 'meditate'. It seemed so foreign, like you had to say these esoteric words and sit forever, and it just isn't me. But the idea of sitting and observing what my mind does, without judging it, learning how to do that... yeah, I could do that kind of meditation. And I seem to be doing it more and more... Yup it's official... I'm definitely Jubu now. (jewish-buddhist), maybe going all the way over to purely 'bu'.
On a more mundane note, I'm finding myself quite obsessed with keeping track of my money, counting it at least a few times each day, it's sort of comical. (not that I'm judging it, of course). But ever since I went to 4 nights a week at the restaurant, I've been able to live in Chiang Mai without going to the ATM. I have the exact same amount of money I had when I last went to the bank machine 18 days ago...15,000 baht, about $500.00. And that calculus of earning my keep here is kinda thrilling for a person like me. Such a gift to have found a way to pay my way in this lifestyle by doing something I adore doing, making music. It's almost of too good to be true, but it's true for now. (of course I didn't pay for the dental work out of my playing, but the regular day to day of living here, yup, that's from music)
And speaking of music, I've been busting out lots of tunes from the recesses of my brain. They're in there, and now they get to come out and get sung into the microphone. Last night I played 'There's a Place For Us' from West Side Story, always LOVED that song, and now that I haven't had a toke for over 5 weeks (but who's counting?) I can hit the high notes easily and it sounds good. (And Noi likes it, which is always a consideration). She's been so supportive of what I'm doing there, best boss ever. I get to do it again this evening, make my next 1,000 baht, keep the music and the lifestyle flowing... Dreamy....
And in yesterday's yoga convergence, three of us got together and Satia, who claims to be a yoga teacher, led us. She was great and the thing that she said which I hadn't quite internalized before is that yoga is not about a workout or a competition. It's a coordination of the breathing with the movement of the body. So this pose is on an in breath and this pose is on an out breath and it brings the breath and the body together. I kinda knew that on some level, but hearing it now, it totally made sense. And of course the more I do it, the more it becomes second nature, and the deeper we go.
Which is not to say that I'm turning into some kind of guru dude, far from it, but I am acquiring some very useful tools along the path of (hopefully) wisdom. That's what it's about, right, this 'getting older' thing? It's not about consuming more or eating more dinners at fancy restaurants, it's about becoming more wise, and more compassionate, both inside and out. It's not about controlling the thoughts, or squelching the impulses. Those are going to come, we couldn't stop them if we wanted to. It's about accepting them, making peace with them, allowing for them, letting them pass.
I never thought that I could 'meditate'. It seemed so foreign, like you had to say these esoteric words and sit forever, and it just isn't me. But the idea of sitting and observing what my mind does, without judging it, learning how to do that... yeah, I could do that kind of meditation. And I seem to be doing it more and more... Yup it's official... I'm definitely Jubu now. (jewish-buddhist), maybe going all the way over to purely 'bu'.
On a more mundane note, I'm finding myself quite obsessed with keeping track of my money, counting it at least a few times each day, it's sort of comical. (not that I'm judging it, of course). But ever since I went to 4 nights a week at the restaurant, I've been able to live in Chiang Mai without going to the ATM. I have the exact same amount of money I had when I last went to the bank machine 18 days ago...15,000 baht, about $500.00. And that calculus of earning my keep here is kinda thrilling for a person like me. Such a gift to have found a way to pay my way in this lifestyle by doing something I adore doing, making music. It's almost of too good to be true, but it's true for now. (of course I didn't pay for the dental work out of my playing, but the regular day to day of living here, yup, that's from music)
And speaking of music, I've been busting out lots of tunes from the recesses of my brain. They're in there, and now they get to come out and get sung into the microphone. Last night I played 'There's a Place For Us' from West Side Story, always LOVED that song, and now that I haven't had a toke for over 5 weeks (but who's counting?) I can hit the high notes easily and it sounds good. (And Noi likes it, which is always a consideration). She's been so supportive of what I'm doing there, best boss ever. I get to do it again this evening, make my next 1,000 baht, keep the music and the lifestyle flowing... Dreamy....
One of the exceedingly rare blues tunes I've ever written. (not a jazz chord to be found)
The groove is like Wilson Pickett's 'Midnight Hour' (old school R and B)
I gave you what you said you wanted
So I thought we would be OK
Girl I'm not the kind who can read your mind
But I sure listen to what you say
And now that look in your eyes is haunted
I gave you what you said you wanted
I gave you what you said you wanted
Yes I followed the recipe
I must have been a fool for stickin' to the rule
Because you up and turned your back on me
I may be down but I'm still undaunted
I gave you what you said you wanted
chorus
Guess we're gonna find out what we're made of
No better teacher than the one we're most afraid of
Don't have to fear it, no we don't have to hide
Can't wait to see you on the other side
I'm sure not saying that I'm any better
In fact I think we're just about the same
We could let it be, or we could set each other free
And neither one should take the blame
Not gonna front, and I ain't gonna flaunt it
But I gave you what you said you wanted...
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