Just another day, or so I thought, dance class at 8:30 followed by a few rounds of disc golf for my morning workout. Class was fantastic and it's a total joy to have a class that challenges me to the degree that Dana's does. She's really coming on as a choreographer and the routines are getting a little bit more difficult, but I find that they are exactly the right level for my development. I'm having to concentrate fully, and give maximum effort. You can't ask for more than that from a class. And I can do it, maybe not perfectly, but the further we go, the more I can recognize and integrate. She adds new twists for each combination, and we're getting quite the repertoire of moves and techniques. Love it.
And then on to the golf course, feeling nicely warmed up by the class, and as usual, it's pretty quiet in the morning. I see that older Thai guy who is there most every day, and I slip in ahead of him, as he's throwing a bunch of discs on number two. I tee off on three so I can stay out of his way. Normally I go pretty fast playing two discs, so everything is as it should be.
Until I temporarily lose a disc on number 4 and have to spend some time wandering around looking for it. As I'm searching about, I see him on the tee, so I wave him on to pass me. I find my disc shortly after so we end up on the 5th tee together and start playing with one another. He introduces himself as 'Sy' and offers me his hand. I say, 'I know you're Sy, we've met before', and then I add that I'm going to Thailand this winter, just like last year. He says, 'I'm not Thai, I'm from Laos, the next country over'. and we begin a fascinating conversation that took a surprising turn.
He mentioned that he hadn't been back for 35 years and added that he had been in jail before he left. The mid 70's was when the Communists took over so it piqued my interest, and sure enough, he had been jailed for working with the Americans during the war, but not just working with them, being a highly placed translator during the 'secret war' in Laos and Cambodia during the Vietnam conflict.
I said, 'what? were you in there with Henry Kissinger?' and he said, yes, many times. I got his basic story.... he was a lawyer trained in Vientienne, the capital of Laos. The Americans paid for him to study in Paris and in London. I said, 'so you're fluent in English, French, and Lao'... to which he added, 'yes, and Spanish, German, Russian and Thai'.
I just got the bare bones of his story, how he was part of the negotiations and translations during the secret war, when the Americans were trying to prevent North Vietnam from supplying their forces along the Ho Chi Minh trail which went through Laos and Cambodia. I will have to ask him much more about it as it is really interesting to me, and what an opportunity to have this guy to talk to.... on the golf course, no less. So the story will continue.
In his personal tale, once Saigon fell and the Communists took over and then the dominoes fell in Laos and Cambodia, he was arrested and imprisoned. At night he was kept in a pit underground and during the day he was part of the 'forced labor'. He had to cut down trees to build settlements, and during that time, there was some kind of accident that broke his leg and put him in the hospital. He was able to escape from that less restrictive environment and fled over the border into Thailand. He tells me that he snuck back into Laos to retrieve his wife and young son and the three of them eventually made it to the US, thanks to some of those connections he had forged in the 60s and 70s. He worked here as a painter and is now retired and living across the street from the disc golf course where he spends most mornings. To be continued.
See what happens...
Had a great experience up in Portland yesterday, and it nearly didn't happen. I was scheduled for a gig at a library on the East side of town, right off the 205, and I left myself plenty of time to get there, like I usually do. I was scheduled to go on at 5pm, and figured I'd arrive around 4:15, just like usual.
But I saw a sign on the highway saying that the 205 was closed due to a truck crash and fire, and to 'find an alternate route'. I called my housemate Mark and asked him to check the map and get back to me, which he did in a few minutes. I'd have to drive into the city and catch an east west route to where the gig was. But damn, it was during the rush hour and with the highway closure, the traffic was gonna be bad. I turned on a Portland radio station to find out what I could, and yeah, things weren't looking good.
Fortunately I had the number of the library so I called in to tell them about the closure and to report on my progress, and then it was just 'see what happens'. I wasn't stressed at all. If I made it, good, if I didn't, oh well, there was nothing I could have done. The traffic slowed to a crawl but kept moving and slowly I got into Portland and began heading east. I kept in contact with the library, and they were able to switch things around a little bit and give me some leeway.
Pulled into the place at 5:07, immediately went to take an enormous piss and then walked into the room to find maybe 60 or 70 folks, lots of young kids, mostly Hispanic, eating their healthy snack of fruit and veggies, cheese and crackers. The event was a 'family health day' put on by the 'Healthy Starts' program, which is some type of consortium that advocates for good nutrition, exercise and all that good stuff. They figured that I'd be the perfect entertainer to add to the program, and they were right. It was in my wheelhouse.
I did a fun half hour, got them moving and laughing and then it was over. The kids got their free book from the library and a good time was had by all. Me, I was kind of ecstatic to have gotten to play the event after wondering whether it would happen. I figured the chances were maybe 50 50, so it was wonderful to hot only do the show, but earn the $300 fee, which comes in handy these days. But I think the most satisfaction comes from the fact that I had zero stress about it. It was out of my hands, and I found it to be a peaceful feeling. Other than having to take a wicked piss for the last half hour of the trip, it was an oddly calming experience. And the show itself was a pure gift. Gracias.
But I saw a sign on the highway saying that the 205 was closed due to a truck crash and fire, and to 'find an alternate route'. I called my housemate Mark and asked him to check the map and get back to me, which he did in a few minutes. I'd have to drive into the city and catch an east west route to where the gig was. But damn, it was during the rush hour and with the highway closure, the traffic was gonna be bad. I turned on a Portland radio station to find out what I could, and yeah, things weren't looking good.
Fortunately I had the number of the library so I called in to tell them about the closure and to report on my progress, and then it was just 'see what happens'. I wasn't stressed at all. If I made it, good, if I didn't, oh well, there was nothing I could have done. The traffic slowed to a crawl but kept moving and slowly I got into Portland and began heading east. I kept in contact with the library, and they were able to switch things around a little bit and give me some leeway.
Pulled into the place at 5:07, immediately went to take an enormous piss and then walked into the room to find maybe 60 or 70 folks, lots of young kids, mostly Hispanic, eating their healthy snack of fruit and veggies, cheese and crackers. The event was a 'family health day' put on by the 'Healthy Starts' program, which is some type of consortium that advocates for good nutrition, exercise and all that good stuff. They figured that I'd be the perfect entertainer to add to the program, and they were right. It was in my wheelhouse.
I did a fun half hour, got them moving and laughing and then it was over. The kids got their free book from the library and a good time was had by all. Me, I was kind of ecstatic to have gotten to play the event after wondering whether it would happen. I figured the chances were maybe 50 50, so it was wonderful to hot only do the show, but earn the $300 fee, which comes in handy these days. But I think the most satisfaction comes from the fact that I had zero stress about it. It was out of my hands, and I found it to be a peaceful feeling. Other than having to take a wicked piss for the last half hour of the trip, it was an oddly calming experience. And the show itself was a pure gift. Gracias.
Wordplay this week
I don't exactly know how I got into it exactly, don't know why I started searching for little spoonerisms, those little quips in which the consonants get switched. But it totally feeds my 'puzzler' mentality, and if I start thinking about creating new ones, it's a pleasurable diversion, much like doing a puzzle. The good ones have some kind of point, more than the simple fact of actual words being created, they need to have some other element to make the cut. The first batch are below. Maybe they'll end up as patter, or lyrics or Facebook fill, but I do enjoy the process of trying to uncover them. Id bet that there will be more to come.
The dumb say 'some day'
I had a happy Christmas on a crappy isthmus
She was the thespian leader of the lesbian theater
It's the right time for a tight rhyme
They still moan about the mill stone
Batteries to flame, flattery's to blame
Reports of nude labor from the lewd neighbor
Wrote a bad song about a sad bong
Go pray, I'm pro-gay
He wrote the 'Gay Pride Pray Guide'
Rip the seal and sip the real
The jerky moose left some murky juice
A would be curse could be worse
It might be a 'bite me' situation
I'm quite trippy though trite and quippy
Could you maybe obey me?
You want to weigh me? May we? Mais oui!
Try meat.... my treat
Make tea..... take me
I'll surely go to the girlie show
Don't sigh, mister, that's my sister
Scrap the totem pole and tap the scrotum pole
I'd rather dip the wick than whip the dick
Make fast the fake mast
The Misses were pissed when pisses were missed
My psychiatrist said I have a 'passive meanness'
My wife is wonderful except for the fussy parts
The dumb say 'some day'
I had a happy Christmas on a crappy isthmus
She was the thespian leader of the lesbian theater
It's the right time for a tight rhyme
They still moan about the mill stone
Batteries to flame, flattery's to blame
Reports of nude labor from the lewd neighbor
Wrote a bad song about a sad bong
Go pray, I'm pro-gay
He wrote the 'Gay Pride Pray Guide'
Rip the seal and sip the real
The jerky moose left some murky juice
A would be curse could be worse
It might be a 'bite me' situation
I'm quite trippy though trite and quippy
Could you maybe obey me?
You want to weigh me? May we? Mais oui!
Try meat.... my treat
Make tea..... take me
I'll surely go to the girlie show
Don't sigh, mister, that's my sister
Scrap the totem pole and tap the scrotum pole
I'd rather dip the wick than whip the dick
Make fast the fake mast
The Misses were pissed when pisses were missed
My psychiatrist said I have a 'passive meanness'
My wife is wonderful except for the fussy parts
Early morning on a Saturday
What a surprise, I'm up early! (he said sarcastically) The ability to stay asleep is not one of my better attributes these days, but I don't particularly mind, since I have avoided the type of lifestyle that requires a full day's effort working for 'the man'. Instead, I can go ahead and do these morning gigs today and then snooze out in the afternoon, when the energy wanes, which it will.
But I'm feeling kind of psyched up today, especially for the first gig, which is a 50 minute set at Saturday Market. Normally I play the 'kid's set' at 11am, where my focus is on providing entertainment and excitement for the little ones. I'm good at it, I've been doing it for years, and it's fun, if a little predictable. I bring instruments, get the kids playing and moving, have a little party at the market etc.
Today it's different, in that I'm playing the 10am slot, which is usually a single musician making some sounds while the regulars have coffee and shmooze and no one pays much attention. In other words, a low pressure gig. So why am I feeling pressure? Because I've decided to bring a keyboard to the market and play through some of my 'greatest hits', a lot of which very few people have heard. Question.... can something be a greatest hit, if no one has ever heard it? Answer.... no and yes.
Well I suppose I was self-mocking when I called them 'greatest hits'. Reminds me of when I was in college and playing intramural softball with my buddies from the dorm. We called ourselves the 'Kruson Hall Tokers'. The faculty member, Coach Castrovillo, who was in charge of the league asked 'What's a toker?'. I said, 'Coach, a good toke is like a good hit' and he said, 'OK'. This is a true story, and I must give myself some retro props for thinking on my feet way back when. And ironically, some of my greatest musical creations also have that 'hit' connection. But I digress.
Over the years I've written a lot of really good songs, and today I'm going to break some of them out and share them with whomever is there. I did a Facebook invitation thing where I invited about 120 people, or at least let them know that it was happening, and for me, that constitutes a major promotional effort. And I've enlisted my son Zach (Rashid) to come and videotape the show, in hopes of having a few good songs to put up on Youtube next week. More sharing and just putting it out there. It's a small thing, but it's also a big thing, in the sense that who knows how long I get to live on the planet, and if I'm gone, it will be nice to leave a record of some of my efforts... like this blog for example. It's saying, 'I was here, I thought such and such, I created such and such, I lived such and such. Ah yes, my birthday is coming up in a few weeks, and you never know how many more trips around the sun you get to make.
Perhaps I should make a song list (something I rarely do, by the way, as I tend to let it flow in performance). After all these years, I trust the moment and my ability to think on my feet, use the improvisational skills and be in the present tense. And some of the best shows are ones in which something brand new happens on the spot. It keeps it fresh and exciting. But today, since I'm gonna be recording the event, I'd like to have a little more of a plan. So here are some of the songs I'm going to play.
Barra de Navidad a jazzy latin song about that beach town on the west coast of Mexico
One Little Glance a high society swing tune about 'making that connection'.
All I Want This Holiday a love ballad
Fishin' Song Americana tune with a twist
Because I Want You Fats Waller style jazz
Sweet as Cherry Pie Dixieland feel, might do it on guitar...
When I Was Ready for You Randy Newman style piano song
Song and Dance Man Uptempo swing
Love is Everywhere a Contemporary Christian or Rosh Hashana song. It's a God thing.
Mardi Gras zydeco double entendre comedy tune
American Song ragtime
Bruchim Habaim a song of welcome in your typical Hebrew salsa vein.
Time for a shower, a little practicing and off we go...
But I'm feeling kind of psyched up today, especially for the first gig, which is a 50 minute set at Saturday Market. Normally I play the 'kid's set' at 11am, where my focus is on providing entertainment and excitement for the little ones. I'm good at it, I've been doing it for years, and it's fun, if a little predictable. I bring instruments, get the kids playing and moving, have a little party at the market etc.
Today it's different, in that I'm playing the 10am slot, which is usually a single musician making some sounds while the regulars have coffee and shmooze and no one pays much attention. In other words, a low pressure gig. So why am I feeling pressure? Because I've decided to bring a keyboard to the market and play through some of my 'greatest hits', a lot of which very few people have heard. Question.... can something be a greatest hit, if no one has ever heard it? Answer.... no and yes.
Well I suppose I was self-mocking when I called them 'greatest hits'. Reminds me of when I was in college and playing intramural softball with my buddies from the dorm. We called ourselves the 'Kruson Hall Tokers'. The faculty member, Coach Castrovillo, who was in charge of the league asked 'What's a toker?'. I said, 'Coach, a good toke is like a good hit' and he said, 'OK'. This is a true story, and I must give myself some retro props for thinking on my feet way back when. And ironically, some of my greatest musical creations also have that 'hit' connection. But I digress.
Over the years I've written a lot of really good songs, and today I'm going to break some of them out and share them with whomever is there. I did a Facebook invitation thing where I invited about 120 people, or at least let them know that it was happening, and for me, that constitutes a major promotional effort. And I've enlisted my son Zach (Rashid) to come and videotape the show, in hopes of having a few good songs to put up on Youtube next week. More sharing and just putting it out there. It's a small thing, but it's also a big thing, in the sense that who knows how long I get to live on the planet, and if I'm gone, it will be nice to leave a record of some of my efforts... like this blog for example. It's saying, 'I was here, I thought such and such, I created such and such, I lived such and such. Ah yes, my birthday is coming up in a few weeks, and you never know how many more trips around the sun you get to make.
Perhaps I should make a song list (something I rarely do, by the way, as I tend to let it flow in performance). After all these years, I trust the moment and my ability to think on my feet, use the improvisational skills and be in the present tense. And some of the best shows are ones in which something brand new happens on the spot. It keeps it fresh and exciting. But today, since I'm gonna be recording the event, I'd like to have a little more of a plan. So here are some of the songs I'm going to play.
Barra de Navidad a jazzy latin song about that beach town on the west coast of Mexico
One Little Glance a high society swing tune about 'making that connection'.
All I Want This Holiday a love ballad
Fishin' Song Americana tune with a twist
Because I Want You Fats Waller style jazz
Sweet as Cherry Pie Dixieland feel, might do it on guitar...
When I Was Ready for You Randy Newman style piano song
Song and Dance Man Uptempo swing
Love is Everywhere a Contemporary Christian or Rosh Hashana song. It's a God thing.
Mardi Gras zydeco double entendre comedy tune
American Song ragtime
Bruchim Habaim a song of welcome in your typical Hebrew salsa vein.
Time for a shower, a little practicing and off we go...
My first 'Contemporary Christian' tune
And being that I'm neither contemporary nor Christian, I have no idea why this tune came through... but it did. It started a few nights ago as I was playing piano, jamming around in the key of F, some melody attached itself to my brain and my fingers started finding their way to the notes I was hearing. I ended up hanging out there for an hour or so, and it was a strange phenomenon, particularly in the left hand accompaniment.
Rather than do my typical 'root five root bass line, I started with something more plaintive and peaceful. And between the melody and the accompaniment, it started sounding like some kind of theme song for a tear jerker movie, a la Brian's Song. I was tapping into a sentimental place, and it was so satisfying to have it in my fingers, I kept playing it over and over. Woke up the next morning and did it some more, while starting to imagine how words could take their place in that melody.
And for some reason, I got the hit that it's a perfect song for my friend's congregation at the Faith Center, which is a big 'four square' church on the west side of Eugene. Russ sings there and is one of the worship leaders, and I imagine him introducing this song to his group. Having a destination for an artistic expression definitely colors the lyrics, but what the heck, I just followed where I was led, and ended up writing a God song. I'd like to sing it for Russ, see if he resonates with it, and invite him to contribute some lyrics that might fit in better than mine do. A collaboration, if you will. Here's my first draft:
I may not be all that I should
I didn't do all that I could
But if somehow, you love me still
And grant me time, my heart to fill
With a joy that's never ending
And a love that doesn't fear
With beauty and abundance
All the blessings of the year
Like the wind upon the water
Spirit in the air
A light unto the heavens
Your love is everywhere
If I could live all that I know
How I would give, how I would grow
So starting here, from right now
I won't refuse, I will allow
This love that's never ending
A joy that doesn't fear
All the beauty and abundance
The blessings of the year
Like the wind upon the water
Spirit in the air
A light unto the heavens
Your love is everywhere
Rather than do my typical 'root five root bass line, I started with something more plaintive and peaceful. And between the melody and the accompaniment, it started sounding like some kind of theme song for a tear jerker movie, a la Brian's Song. I was tapping into a sentimental place, and it was so satisfying to have it in my fingers, I kept playing it over and over. Woke up the next morning and did it some more, while starting to imagine how words could take their place in that melody.
And for some reason, I got the hit that it's a perfect song for my friend's congregation at the Faith Center, which is a big 'four square' church on the west side of Eugene. Russ sings there and is one of the worship leaders, and I imagine him introducing this song to his group. Having a destination for an artistic expression definitely colors the lyrics, but what the heck, I just followed where I was led, and ended up writing a God song. I'd like to sing it for Russ, see if he resonates with it, and invite him to contribute some lyrics that might fit in better than mine do. A collaboration, if you will. Here's my first draft:
I may not be all that I should
I didn't do all that I could
But if somehow, you love me still
And grant me time, my heart to fill
With a joy that's never ending
And a love that doesn't fear
With beauty and abundance
All the blessings of the year
Like the wind upon the water
Spirit in the air
A light unto the heavens
Your love is everywhere
If I could live all that I know
How I would give, how I would grow
So starting here, from right now
I won't refuse, I will allow
This love that's never ending
A joy that doesn't fear
All the beauty and abundance
The blessings of the year
Like the wind upon the water
Spirit in the air
A light unto the heavens
Your love is everywhere
Simple Pleasures
Sleepy time in the middle of the day, I've taken a Pilates class, done the crossword and gone shopping. Now I could fall asleep, since I didn't get enough shut eye last night, but I'll hold off for a few minutes and see if there's anything cooking inside my brain. pause pause, nope, nothing there, goodnight. (he said facetiously)
I've had a busy few weeks, lots of performances in far-flung regions, and I've been pretty happy with the results. But the thing that is really turning my crank lately (so to speak), is the time I've been putting in on piano. And in fact, when I look ahead at the schedule for the next few weeks, the gig that excites me the most is a 10am slot at Saturday Market, at which I'll play many of the originals that I'm working on now.
It's a gig that will pay me maybe $50, but it obviously isn't about the money, more about the essence of what I've been doing all these years. I think I have resigned myself to the reality that I'm not going to be a famous guy on a big scale, not going to do a lot of touring or marketing or producing or merchandising or any other 'ing' that we'd care to introduce. For whatever reasons, it's simply not in my DNA or my will to go that route. I realize that this admission could easily be viewed as self-defeating, self-limiting etc, and that is undoubtedly true, if one chooses to think in those terms. If the world is viewed as a Tony Robbins canvas in which our job is to be a world beater, super fit, super accomplished, super super super, than I'm sure that I would be very depressed by my lack of production. God knows I can make that case....
But what if Tony Robbins isn't the standard? What if all the noise on TV and radio and internet and facebook is just so much distraction? What's left? What's right? I'm thinking about the homeless guy who I pass most mornings on my way into town. If I catch the red light and am stopped in front of him, I'll reach into the change drawer and fish out a buck or so. If I just drive past, I make it a point to look at him and nod my head in acknowledgment, as if to say, 'I see you, I respect you, you are a human being'. He always gives a wave in response, and my guess is that it's important to make that connection and share that moment. It's more important than the money, that's my guess anyhow. (He might have a very different opinion about it, but my sense is that a look in the eye is a valuable commodity)
And maybe there's some connection to music in that simple interaction. I have all these songs I've written over the years. A number of them are very good, little works of art, with a lot of craft applied in the creation. That's right, they're my little arts and crafts projects of a lifetime. They are mostly autobiographical so in total, they are a self portrait that goes through time. They are not a boxed set, though it's tempting to put the best ones together into a collection. And when I'm gone, if someone wants to listen and know who I was, here ya go, it's in the music. Like Dan Bern said, 'And if you judge me tonight, judge me by the songs I write, that's all I am to you' from his song 'Black Tornado'.
My sense, (or is it my rationalization), is that there is high value in the art itself. Whether it makes a lot of money or notoriety is likely secondary to the art itself. It's nice for it to be heard and appreciated, and I think I'll invite a bunch of folks to come down and listen to 45 minutes of the Glauber songbook. Hopefully they'll have the ability to just enjoy, not have to chatter too much, just 'lend me their ears' for 3/4 of an hour. If it happens, great, and if not, there's still a great deal of pleasure in getting ready to share it. I've been breaking out some of the old songs, changing things up in some of them, and creating a 'this is my life' soundtrack for the good folks at Saturday Market. Since it's not a 'kids set', which is my norm down there, I don't have to get the kids jumping up and down. Instead I get to play my version of songs in the key of life... Looking forward to it, and to the process beforehand. Simple pleasures....
I've had a busy few weeks, lots of performances in far-flung regions, and I've been pretty happy with the results. But the thing that is really turning my crank lately (so to speak), is the time I've been putting in on piano. And in fact, when I look ahead at the schedule for the next few weeks, the gig that excites me the most is a 10am slot at Saturday Market, at which I'll play many of the originals that I'm working on now.
It's a gig that will pay me maybe $50, but it obviously isn't about the money, more about the essence of what I've been doing all these years. I think I have resigned myself to the reality that I'm not going to be a famous guy on a big scale, not going to do a lot of touring or marketing or producing or merchandising or any other 'ing' that we'd care to introduce. For whatever reasons, it's simply not in my DNA or my will to go that route. I realize that this admission could easily be viewed as self-defeating, self-limiting etc, and that is undoubtedly true, if one chooses to think in those terms. If the world is viewed as a Tony Robbins canvas in which our job is to be a world beater, super fit, super accomplished, super super super, than I'm sure that I would be very depressed by my lack of production. God knows I can make that case....
But what if Tony Robbins isn't the standard? What if all the noise on TV and radio and internet and facebook is just so much distraction? What's left? What's right? I'm thinking about the homeless guy who I pass most mornings on my way into town. If I catch the red light and am stopped in front of him, I'll reach into the change drawer and fish out a buck or so. If I just drive past, I make it a point to look at him and nod my head in acknowledgment, as if to say, 'I see you, I respect you, you are a human being'. He always gives a wave in response, and my guess is that it's important to make that connection and share that moment. It's more important than the money, that's my guess anyhow. (He might have a very different opinion about it, but my sense is that a look in the eye is a valuable commodity)
And maybe there's some connection to music in that simple interaction. I have all these songs I've written over the years. A number of them are very good, little works of art, with a lot of craft applied in the creation. That's right, they're my little arts and crafts projects of a lifetime. They are mostly autobiographical so in total, they are a self portrait that goes through time. They are not a boxed set, though it's tempting to put the best ones together into a collection. And when I'm gone, if someone wants to listen and know who I was, here ya go, it's in the music. Like Dan Bern said, 'And if you judge me tonight, judge me by the songs I write, that's all I am to you' from his song 'Black Tornado'.
My sense, (or is it my rationalization), is that there is high value in the art itself. Whether it makes a lot of money or notoriety is likely secondary to the art itself. It's nice for it to be heard and appreciated, and I think I'll invite a bunch of folks to come down and listen to 45 minutes of the Glauber songbook. Hopefully they'll have the ability to just enjoy, not have to chatter too much, just 'lend me their ears' for 3/4 of an hour. If it happens, great, and if not, there's still a great deal of pleasure in getting ready to share it. I've been breaking out some of the old songs, changing things up in some of them, and creating a 'this is my life' soundtrack for the good folks at Saturday Market. Since it's not a 'kids set', which is my norm down there, I don't have to get the kids jumping up and down. Instead I get to play my version of songs in the key of life... Looking forward to it, and to the process beforehand. Simple pleasures....
The leopard and his spots.....
As in, 'the leopard can't change its spots'.... I had an experience today that was so reminiscent of past similar experiences, well one at least, and that phrase jumped into my brain. It had to do with the fact that now is the time to go ahead and buy a ticket to Asia if I'm really going to spend next winter there, and did I really want to take that step? Because it feels like a big one.
So a few days ago, I began researching some possible flights on Priceline, but I found that I didn't feel ready to make the commitment. Because doing so feels tantamount to saying, 'I'm checking out of here, I'm rejecting that whole notion of planning for the future, getting my ducks in a row, building whatever portfolio, or business or web presence or press packet or etc etc etc... all of the shoulds that I don't do anyhow, but haven't been willing to really let go of. As if one day I might become a different person who is oriented that modern way.
The alternative is more mysterious and adventurous, maybe riskier, certainly more original (or is it?) and I found that at first blush, I wasn't willing to let go of the path of the 'should'. Not that I would seriously take a bunch of steps to live that way, but rejecting it feels significant, at least at the moment.
So today, I went ecstatic dancing, visited my friend Jack, and then got the idea to go back online and see about that ticket. See if the price had changed, see if I had changed? Priceline is pretty cool and convenient because when I went to the site, I could immediately retrieve the previous search, and there it was. A lower fare, from Eugene, no less, a good itinerary 22 hours and I'm in Bangkok, two easy layovers and boom, I'm there.
Return flights not as convenient, longer layovers but not too bad. Total round trip price $1204.00 Eugene-Seattle-Seoul-Bangkok. Return the same way. I chose a return on March 7, which is 4 months after the lift off. That's quite a window of time in Asia..... if I were to buy it.
And now, here's where the leopard comes in. Most people would consider the pros and cons, take some time to evaluate, plan, (I mis-typed 'play' for 'plan', and I'd call that the proverbial 'Freudian slip'. Where was I? Yeah, most serious minded people would consider carefully the ramifications of both choices and then make an informed decision.
Me? I clicked on 'purchase ticket' in about 3 seconds. It's not rational, it's about some other kind of trust in the universe and in myself, I suppose.
Brings back the time when I was 25 years old, just returned from a year and a half abroad in Europe and Israel. I enrolled in Skidmore College's University Without Walls and was going to begin classes in January. But it was only the 1st of December so I had a month to kill, or rather 'enjoy' before settling in for an upstate New York winter. (What was I thinking?). I went to see my great friends Howie and Jane and their sons down in the Florida Keys, because, seriously people, December is a lot nicer there than in New York.
I was hanging with my peeps, I met a woman, got some scabies from the funky bedding, did some sailing with Howie, drank Cuban coffee and listened to a lot of Bob Marley and the Wailers. Around Christmas I called my family in New York and heard the news that my brother Bob had 'borrowed' my car, wrecked it in the snow, and I'd have to get a new set of wheels. I wasn't too angry about it, more philosophical at that moment.
A day later, I ate a hit of LSD (haven't done it since, that was the last time, at age 25), and while under the influence, I was laying back on Howie's boat 'La Buena Onda' (the good vibe), just chillin' with my French Canadian girlfriend du jour. She was talking about something and I asked her to stop for a second... because an idea was taking shape in my brain, and I needed it to continue coming into focus. It was like a circle was forming itself, and when the two sides came together in the whole, I had this flash of 'I'm going to San Francisco'.
I hadn't considered moving to San Francisco, though I had been through there a few years prior. All of a sudden, the idea popped into my head, and that was it. I was heading to San Francisco. No pros and cons, no considering of alternatives, the decision was just done. When I got back to NY and my mom picked me up at the airport, she said something like, 'don't worry, we'll find another car'. I said,'no need, I'm going to San Francisco' She got a real sad look in her eye at that news, some kind of realization that I wasn't going to do it like everyone else, and maybe I wouldn't even finish college. I told her that I could take classes in SF, as it was a 'university without walls' program, and that's what I did.... among other things. But the point of the story is that when it's time to make one of those big decisions, I err on the side of spontaneity, trust, spirit and Vamos. Ticket is purchased for a 4 month odyssey to Asia beginning on November 6. Vamos!
So a few days ago, I began researching some possible flights on Priceline, but I found that I didn't feel ready to make the commitment. Because doing so feels tantamount to saying, 'I'm checking out of here, I'm rejecting that whole notion of planning for the future, getting my ducks in a row, building whatever portfolio, or business or web presence or press packet or etc etc etc... all of the shoulds that I don't do anyhow, but haven't been willing to really let go of. As if one day I might become a different person who is oriented that modern way.
The alternative is more mysterious and adventurous, maybe riskier, certainly more original (or is it?) and I found that at first blush, I wasn't willing to let go of the path of the 'should'. Not that I would seriously take a bunch of steps to live that way, but rejecting it feels significant, at least at the moment.
So today, I went ecstatic dancing, visited my friend Jack, and then got the idea to go back online and see about that ticket. See if the price had changed, see if I had changed? Priceline is pretty cool and convenient because when I went to the site, I could immediately retrieve the previous search, and there it was. A lower fare, from Eugene, no less, a good itinerary 22 hours and I'm in Bangkok, two easy layovers and boom, I'm there.
Return flights not as convenient, longer layovers but not too bad. Total round trip price $1204.00 Eugene-Seattle-Seoul-Bangkok. Return the same way. I chose a return on March 7, which is 4 months after the lift off. That's quite a window of time in Asia..... if I were to buy it.
And now, here's where the leopard comes in. Most people would consider the pros and cons, take some time to evaluate, plan, (I mis-typed 'play' for 'plan', and I'd call that the proverbial 'Freudian slip'. Where was I? Yeah, most serious minded people would consider carefully the ramifications of both choices and then make an informed decision.
Me? I clicked on 'purchase ticket' in about 3 seconds. It's not rational, it's about some other kind of trust in the universe and in myself, I suppose.
Brings back the time when I was 25 years old, just returned from a year and a half abroad in Europe and Israel. I enrolled in Skidmore College's University Without Walls and was going to begin classes in January. But it was only the 1st of December so I had a month to kill, or rather 'enjoy' before settling in for an upstate New York winter. (What was I thinking?). I went to see my great friends Howie and Jane and their sons down in the Florida Keys, because, seriously people, December is a lot nicer there than in New York.
I was hanging with my peeps, I met a woman, got some scabies from the funky bedding, did some sailing with Howie, drank Cuban coffee and listened to a lot of Bob Marley and the Wailers. Around Christmas I called my family in New York and heard the news that my brother Bob had 'borrowed' my car, wrecked it in the snow, and I'd have to get a new set of wheels. I wasn't too angry about it, more philosophical at that moment.
A day later, I ate a hit of LSD (haven't done it since, that was the last time, at age 25), and while under the influence, I was laying back on Howie's boat 'La Buena Onda' (the good vibe), just chillin' with my French Canadian girlfriend du jour. She was talking about something and I asked her to stop for a second... because an idea was taking shape in my brain, and I needed it to continue coming into focus. It was like a circle was forming itself, and when the two sides came together in the whole, I had this flash of 'I'm going to San Francisco'.
I hadn't considered moving to San Francisco, though I had been through there a few years prior. All of a sudden, the idea popped into my head, and that was it. I was heading to San Francisco. No pros and cons, no considering of alternatives, the decision was just done. When I got back to NY and my mom picked me up at the airport, she said something like, 'don't worry, we'll find another car'. I said,'no need, I'm going to San Francisco' She got a real sad look in her eye at that news, some kind of realization that I wasn't going to do it like everyone else, and maybe I wouldn't even finish college. I told her that I could take classes in SF, as it was a 'university without walls' program, and that's what I did.... among other things. But the point of the story is that when it's time to make one of those big decisions, I err on the side of spontaneity, trust, spirit and Vamos. Ticket is purchased for a 4 month odyssey to Asia beginning on November 6. Vamos!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)